asscreedkinkmeme ([personal profile] asscreedkinkmeme) wrote2011-03-29 05:37 pm
Entry tags:

Kink Meme - Assassin's Creed pt.3

Assassin's Creed Kink Meme pt.3
Fill Only


Get out of my bureau!

☃ Comment anonymously with a character/pairing and a kink/prompt.

☃ Comment is filled by another anonymous with fanfiction/art/or any other appropriate medium.

☃ One request per post, but fill the request as much as you want.

☃ The fill/request doesn't necessarily need to be smut.

☃ Don't flame, if you have nothing good to say, don't say anything.

☃ Have a question? Feel free to PM me.

☃ Last, but not least: HAVE FUN!

List of Kinks
(Livejorunal) Archive
#2 (Livejournal) Archive
(Delicious.com) Archive
(Dreamwidth) Archive <- Currently active
Part 1
Part 2
Part 4
Part 5
Fills Only
Discussion

Who Knew?

(Anonymous) 2011-07-25 01:34 am (UTC)(link)
Altair's a ghost and less than amused, Ezio's a ghost and seems to not understand the word "No", and Desmond's caught in the middle of it all. Who knew Altair had a feminine body underneath those flimsy robes...

Re: Who Knew?

(Anonymous) 2011-07-25 01:43 am (UTC)(link)
O.O OMG. YES!!!!! :D

Re: Who Knew?

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Re: Who Knew?

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-25 13:37 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Who Knew?

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-25 17:48 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Who Knew?

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-28 03:39 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Who Knew?

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-31 03:40 (UTC) - Expand

Ezio is a cocktease & a troll and gets comeuppance

(Anonymous) 2011-07-25 02:52 am (UTC)(link)
Ezio pre-hanging etc aged 17, hangs around Leo and flirts with him, making Leonardo crazy. He repeatedly drops hints that he would let Leonardo take him, they start kissing and touching and getting more & more naked only for Ezio to bail and run off, going "lolololjk jk jk :PP :DDDD ahahha" This goes on for weeks if Anon wants... with Leonardo in a state of sexual frustration and constantly thinking about this jailbait young cocktease with his firm ass, delicious flat abs and handsome face. Eventually something happens, whatever, and this time Leonardo manages to ends up rimming Ezio, reducing him to a writhing, quivering, incoherent mess, desperate to have something, anything, pushed inside him. But now it's Leo's turn to tease, and he refuses to penetrate the young man in any way, he gets the oil out and teases him, pretends like he is about to slip a finger in but never does etc etc... all the while Ezio begs and pleads to be taken and mumbles his contrition for being such a tool... but Leonardo is merciless. whether Leo eventually takes him is up to you, maybe he just rubs off between his oiled slippery ass cheeks and cums on his hole without ever entering him. :P~~~

Re: Ezio is a cocktease & a troll and gets comeuppance

(Anonymous) 2011-07-25 05:44 am (UTC)(link)
Hhhhnggghh. Want so hard.

Re: Ezio is a cocktease & a troll and gets comeuppance

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Re: Ezio is a cocktease & a troll and gets comeuppance

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Re: Ezio is a cocktease & a troll and gets comeuppance

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Re: Ezio is a cocktease & a troll and gets comeuppance

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-31 05:08 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Ezio is a cocktease & a troll and gets comeuppance

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-31 06:05 (UTC) - Expand

Ezio/Leo, after the Temple of Pythagoras

(Anonymous) 2011-07-25 05:22 am (UTC)(link)
(Possible DLC spoilers)

So this anon was replaying the DaVinci Disappearance DLC today and was pretty heartbroken by the Hermeticists beating up Leo... I just wanted to hug him better put a steak on his eye.

My prompt is just that: Ezio and Leo after the escape from the Temple of Pythagoras, cleaning up each other's injuries and taking comfort in each other's company. (I didn't get the full sync so Ezio took a bit of a beating... I'm sure it would upset Leo to see his friend hurt rescuing him.)

Can be slash or smut or not, don't care, just want some fluff and mutual hurt/comfort.

Re: Ezio/Leo, after the Temple of Pythagoras

(Anonymous) 2011-07-25 11:34 pm (UTC)(link)
Unf yes. YES.

Re: Ezio/Leo, after the Temple of Pythagoras

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Re: Ezio/Leo, after the Temple of Pythagoras

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-27 19:34 (UTC) - Expand

Life Isn't That Grand

(Anonymous) 2011-07-25 02:25 pm (UTC)(link)
Altair can cook and dance surprisingly well. Ezio can't seem to leave Altair alone for some reason. Desmond is just stuck in an apartment with both of them... Poor Desmond.

Re: Life Isn't That Grand

(Anonymous) 2011-07-25 10:34 pm (UTC)(link)
I love Desmond as the monkey in the middle. Seconded.

Re: Life Isn't That Grand

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-31 03:41 (UTC) - Expand

(Anonymous) 2011-07-25 07:18 pm (UTC)(link)
... I wanna see Altair be a nurse (not a doctor a nurse) for Desmond who say... lost his ability to speak from a tragic accident. Maybe have it set in a hospital, Altair's house, Desmond's house or bar, etc.

Can I see a bit of Shaun/Des and somehow pair Altair with someone (Ezio, Malik, or Desmond if it comes down to it)

Can have a quiet, sexy, and oblivious Altair too?

Hello~ Nurse!

(Anonymous) 2011-07-25 07:36 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh

my

GOSH!!!

The idea of Altair in a Nurse's dress made my mind melt... hurrr...

Re: Hello~ Nurse!

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-31 21:20 (UTC) - Expand

(no subject)

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-26 01:34 (UTC) - Expand

MUST HAVE.

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-30 21:45 (UTC) - Expand

I am missing a kink

(Anonymous) 2011-07-25 09:14 pm (UTC)(link)
Where is the whipping? This anon craves a good whipping!

I was thinking that every Rafiq keeps a whip under the counter as it is within their right to beat a novice or otherwise lower-ranked assassin into submission, for punishment if they screw up big time. You can guess where I'm going...

PROMPT: Malik, completely fed up with Altair's behaviour orders him to strip and face the wall. He then proceeds to whip the holybajeebus out of Altair, no mercy, both because he thinks the assassin deserves it, and to vent his own hate and frustration. Altair takes it without complaint because he wants to please.

Massive bonus points for bloody whip marks all over Altair's back, and Malik forcing him to count each stroke out loud. If he screws up once, he has to start over.

Smut not necessary but always welcome, as is Malik comforting Altair with bandages and stuff after he's done raging.

Fffffff I may have to doodle this out. Whipping makes my girl-boner weep.

Re: I am missing a kink

(Anonymous) 2011-07-26 06:12 pm (UTC)(link)
This is not my fetish, but I still want it, unf.

Re: I am missing a kink

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-28 01:34 (UTC) - Expand

OP

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-29 17:01 (UTC) - Expand

Re: I am missing a kink

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-30 02:39 (UTC) - Expand

WriterAnon

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-02 09:34 (UTC) - Expand

Re: WriterAnon

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Re: I am missing a kink

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-05 07:10 (UTC) - Expand

OP

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-14 18:17 (UTC) - Expand

Re: I am missing a kink

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-08 10:41 (UTC) - Expand

Can we get some Rebecca love ppl?

(Anonymous) 2011-07-25 11:48 pm (UTC)(link)
So in a previous prompt, rebecca and ezio (via desmond) had sex on the animus. So I want a modern AU of Ezio/Rebecca hardcore, wild animal, ripping each others clothes off, up against the wall sex. I want ezio to show no mercy, and prove why he's such a ladies man.

Plus points if Altair or desmond gets involved
Double plus points if Shaun overhears the whole thing

I need this like burning! Please, make it so!

Re: Can we get some Rebecca love ppl?

(Anonymous) 2011-07-26 09:15 pm (UTC)(link)
Oh god I do want so much. So very much.

Re: Can we get some Rebecca love ppl?

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-27 03:15 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Can we get some Rebecca love ppl? OP

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-27 19:09 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Can we get some Rebecca love ppl?

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-03 15:57 (UTC) - Expand

(Anonymous) 2011-07-26 12:32 am (UTC)(link)
I think I posted this on part 1 without realising, and I'm not sure if it'll be noticed there.
Anyway. Requesting this for a friend.

Ezio/Machiavelli.

A new spin on the term 'Machiavellian', maybe. Do with this what you will.

(Anonymous) 2011-07-27 04:01 am (UTC)(link)
>A new spin on the term 'Machiavellian'

I'm not sure where you were going with this, OP, but it sounds sexy and I like it. Seconded because I just finished The Life of Castruccio Castracani and I need moar Machiavelli.

A new spin on the term 'Machiavellian'

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-29 13:33 (UTC) - Expand

OP here

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-30 08:29 (UTC) - Expand

Anonymous Sex

(Anonymous) 2011-07-26 06:15 am (UTC)(link)
Am I the only one getting annoyed at people breaking the anonymous rule? Lets get our mask back on and be one entity. Lets have some fic where we get some anonymous fucking.

I know there's a misfire fill with a gloryhole, so lets go for something else.

A masked ball, a blindfold, Desmond feeling someone touching him but unable to break out of the Animus to see whose doing it, Altair being fed a weird aphrodisiac drug that also blinds him during his initiation, Ezio getting ravished by a man in a full face mask during that celebration I can't remember, hell, I'll even take something from the Multiplayer.

Avante!

Re: Anonymous Sex

(Anonymous) 2011-07-26 06:44 pm (UTC)(link)
Seconding...anonymously.

and because I totally want drugged novice Altair

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What Is That?

(Anonymous) 2011-07-26 04:19 pm (UTC)(link)
What do Altair and Ezio think of Desmond's American food?

Mini-fill: Subjective Taste

(Anonymous) 2011-07-26 10:09 pm (UTC)(link)
The first thing the two assassins noticed was the smell. It was thick and greasy, saturating the entire villa in oily air. Altair could have sworn that there was now a slick sheen to the walls and pillars; Ezio insisted that something had gone terribly wrong in the kitchen. Both were close to doubling over and spilling what little there was in their stomachs to the ground. But they were starving, and if there was food, they would eat it, no matter how potentially disgusting it was. An unspoken virtue of the Order was not to be picky.

They started toward the kitchen hesitantly, the odor growing more and more overwhelming the closer they got. The Italian covered his face with his hand, squinting his eyes. The Syrian opted to wrinkle his nose unpleasantly. The two men stopped at the doorway to the kitchen. Ezio used the doorframe to steady himself. They saw their young descendant sitting at the table devouring something they had never seen before, and realized that whatever Desmond was shoving in his mouth was the source of the greasy smell. Altair gave Desmond a look of repulsed curiosity.

"What is that?" 

Desmond looked up at his ancestors. "Cheese burger," he answered, through a half-chewed mouthful of meat. Altair frowned deeply at his lack of manners. Ezio turned away briefly, only facing Desmond again after he had gagged a few times. Smelling that concoction was one thing, but seeing someone eat it was quite another. "Cheese...burger? You're in Italia, son. Why not have something traditional and delicious instead of...that?" He gestured to the sandwich in Desmond's hands.

It was Desmond's turn to frown. He set his burger on its paper wrapper. "I like cheese burgers. They're my favorite."

They walked over to the table hesitantly and stood next to their tasteless descendant. Altair scowled. "They are disgusting. I can see the grease dripping from your mouth. You should eat hummus, it is good for you."

"Now, hold on, Grandpa," Ezio said, scooting halfway onto Desmond's seat and wrapping his arm around his shoulders, "hummus is not the answer. Desmond would be far happier with some spaghetti or lasagna, wouldn't you, Desmond?" 

"Well, I - "

"Do not call me 'grandpa'," Altair growled. He crossed his arms, moody as usual. "Our descendant does not want any of your culture's soggy pasta. He wants hummus. I know this," he added self-assuredly. 

"What I really want is - "

Ezio pointed a finger at Altair in warning. "Don't you insult Italian cuisine, you old codger. The Auditore family recipe for marinara goes back for generations, and it's far more pleasing to the palate than your mushy hummus." 

"Maybe if Desmond wishes to become a fat slob, he should eat some of your pasta."

"Maybe if Desmond wishes to suffer through tasteless mush, he should eat some of your hummus."

Altair snarled and grabbed Ezio's hair. He pulled the Italian up, and Ezio's arm knocked the rest of Desmond's meal to the floor. The eldest assassin dragged the middle one out of the kitchen. The two continued their bickering in the entrance hall of the villa.

The youngest gazed dejectedly at his lost meal. "Goddamn it." Desmond let his head hit the table. "All I wanted was to eat my stupid cheese burger." 

 
totally unrelated but filling stuff on an iPad is really fun to me for some reason

Re: Mini-fill: Subjective Taste

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-27 00:11 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Mini-fill: Subjective Taste

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-27 18:06 (UTC) - Expand

OP

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-29 14:10 (UTC) - Expand

Authanon here

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-29 17:14 (UTC) - Expand

Malik/Altair

(Anonymous) 2011-07-26 06:46 pm (UTC)(link)
Just in the mood for some cute fluff.

Under strange circumstances, Altair ends up with a feline tail, and fluffy ears.
He can't speak like a human. When he tries, he sounds like a cat. In other words, all he can do is "meow" and "purr" like a cat.
Firstly, Malik laughs, and mocks Altair. Whether he takes in Altair because of pity, or whatever else, he still takes advantage of Altair in his cat-like state.

Bonus points for Malik stroking Altair's cat ears, and he purrs in response which makes Malik go O.O

That's just a normal day- FILL(?)

(Anonymous) 2011-07-30 08:35 pm (UTC)(link)
There were a lot of things that Malik was not expecting to happen that day. Because it seemed like any other day, really. But once he set foot out of the bureau, there was an anxious feeling creeping up his back and he couldn't put a finger on it. So he ignored it. But halfway between his shopping trip he got pickpocketed. And then the half the bottled of ink he bought spilled on the sand almost artistically so when some children pushed him from behind while playing on the plaza.

Oh, and a novice winked at him from a rooftop.

Maybe someone jinxed him or something?

"The heat is taking its toll on me today."

So with a steady pace he walked back to the Bureau and decided to drink some tea and continue the maps he left pending last night now that he was alone.

He heard a thud on the rooftop and almost laughed bitterly at his luck when a minute later he saw a white-hooded figure enter the room. Altair he recognized, and set his quill away from the maps in case a disaster decided to occur (which wouldn't amuse him, he was having a terrible day).

"Peace and Safety brother" He greeted with an almost irritated voice, raising an eyebrow at the slight twitch on Altair's hands.

And almost gasped when he noticed the other slide a little note over the counter and turn around.

"Huh?" With a slight wince at the messy handwritting he noticed it was a report on Altair's mission which confused him because the Assassin usually told him the details after a brief conversation -which he enjoyed, but he'd cut his tongue before admitting it- so when he asked the man what was the meaning of the note and got no answer he proved the other was just trying to annoy him.

"Altair? I asked you what is the meaning of this" He emphatized lifting the note in front of the other male, who turned around slowly, and is he seriously fidgeting!?

He walked out from behind the counter and stood in front of a seemingly nervous Altair, who seemed to shrink a little but stood quiet nonetheless. Oh, he was playing mute. Right, Malik was not in the mood to stand him.

"What is it? Cat ate your tongue?"

And there was no way Malik could have ignored the near jump Altair gave at his joke, or the way the other opened his mouth but seemed to think better of it and closed it again. And he was sure the man was blushing too, but the damn hood made it difficult for him to prove it.

"Aren't you hot with that on?" and in a quick movement grabbed the fabric and plucked it down.

What in hell--

He stared, dumbfounded, how a pair of fluffy, brown cat ears rested on top of Altair's head.

Cat ears.

He was definitely asleep, there was no way this was happening. What was he gonna see next, that he'd also grew a tail!?

And as if he was daring whoever made this to surprise him he noticed a flash of brown behind the man and just HAD to slap himself hard on the face. Which hurted like a bitch.

Why, he'd finally lost it.

However, Altair was not gonna have it that way and glared at Malik with what looked like the most cutest glare Malik had seen, and he couldnt' help but to grin at the face.

"How did this happened?" He asked, and took Altair's hand guiding him to the cushions piled up over a corner, making him sit and plopping down next to... the cat.

Pffft

He noticed the discomfort on the assassin's face and the way his ears -the furry ones mind you- seemed to drop just the tiniest bit, and oh how his hands itched to just touch the damn things.

----------
I have to leave it here for now OP. Apologizing for any fail and hoping you like it. I'll come back if you want, but later xD

Re: That's just a normal day- FILL(?)

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-31 06:02 (UTC) - Expand

OP!

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-01 18:17 (UTC) - Expand

That's just a normal day- FILL 2/?

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-02 10:22 (UTC) - Expand

Re: That's just a normal day- FILL 2/?

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Re: That's just a normal day- FILL 2/?

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It's just a normal day. FILL 3/?

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-26 18:19 (UTC) - Expand

Autornon says: That's just a normal day. FILL 3/?

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-26 18:22 (UTC) - Expand

Re: It's just a normal day. FILL 3/?

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-27 06:58 (UTC) - Expand

authornon here :D

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-29 03:43 (UTC) - Expand

Re: authornon here :D

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-29 04:52 (UTC) - Expand

Re: authornon here :D

(Anonymous) - 2011-09-05 12:20 (UTC) - Expand

That's just a normal day- FILL 4a/?

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Re: That's just a normal day- FILL 4b/?

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Re: That's just a normal day- FILL 4b/?

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Re: That's just a normal day- FILL 4b/?

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(Anonymous) 2011-07-26 09:17 pm (UTC)(link)
Can I have a Bunny!Altair?

(Dirty version of Bunny: Cookies and Cake)
(Innocent version of Bunny: A hug)

BUNNY!

(Anonymous) 2011-07-27 12:13 am (UTC)(link)
Oh my God. I LOVE THIS!!!

(I want the dirty version)

Re: BUNNY!

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-27 18:08 (UTC) - Expand

Oh GOD D:

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-30 20:44 (UTC) - Expand

Danny Wallace and either Nolan North/Francisco Randez

(Anonymous) 2011-07-26 10:40 pm (UTC)(link)
I'm going to hell, aren't I?
But that is my prompt. It would be totally hilarious if they started role playing as their characters.

*slinks back into the dark hole she came out of*

Re: Danny Wallace and either Nolan North/Francisco Randez

(Anonymous) 2011-07-26 11:25 pm (UTC)(link)
*pulls anon back out of her dark hole*

This prompt is fucking fabulous. I love you for dreaming this up and I want it so hard.

The Fangirls Made Us Do It [2/?]

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-23 01:42 (UTC) - Expand

The Fangirls Made Us Do It [3/?]

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-23 01:45 (UTC) - Expand

The Fangirls Made Us Do It [4/?]

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-23 01:47 (UTC) - Expand

OP

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-25 02:26 (UTC) - Expand

~Secrets Seductions or something~

(Anonymous) 2011-07-27 12:59 am (UTC)(link)
Ezio once upon a time stubbles on his father with another man. Believing it to be Lorenzo, he confronts the man years later only to find his suspicions to be wrong. It turns out a certain artist being pounded into by Papa!Auditore.

Bonus points for either current Ezio/Leonardo OR Lorenzo/Leonardo.

AC au; Kadar survives

(Anonymous) 2011-07-27 01:50 am (UTC)(link)
Because Kadar needs love(anon has seen something like this but its different and I don't think the other was filled)

So, (since even in the book Kadar doesn't get more then a mention) Kadar infact surives the attack on Solomon's temple but something prevents him from returning, amnesia or what you will. But Kadar is found and nursed back to health by an strange young man who hides secrets of his own: he is infact a templar/formerly a templar no longer in that order (perhaps he was kicked out/place usurped?).

Anon can do what they want on their fill, but I'd really like the young man who finds Kadar to have a physical impairment; blindness would be interesting. Eventual slash of course. (Kink they're both virgins? XD)

BONUS: Malik does not perish as he does in the book, he's actually rescued by Kadar/the man. They save Sef too? Kadar and the man have kids too by some way

Re: AC au; Kadar survives

(Anonymous) 2011-07-28 02:01 am (UTC)(link)
Writefag here, and I was thinking, and I could totally do the whole cripple thing, but I was thinking perhaps a survivor of torture? But then, the issue came up that they often dealt with the genitals during torture, so they might not be able to have sex and have it pleasing for both sides. D: Would anon still approve? (I can put in lots of fluff to make up for it.) Or are you set on sexy times?

OC

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-28 03:45 (UTC) - Expand

Re: AC au; Kadar survives

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-28 02:06 (UTC) - Expand

Survival of the Luckiest

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Survival of the Luckiest 2

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Re: Survival of the Luckiest 2

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Re: Survival of the Luckiest 2

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Re: Survival of the Luckiest 2

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OP

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Survival of the Luckiest 3

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Survival of the Luckiest 4

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Survival of the Luckiest 5

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Survival of the Luckiest 6

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Survival of the Luckiest 7

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OP

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Re: Survival of the Luckiest 7

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Survival of the Luckiest 8

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Survival of the Luckiest 9

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Survival of the Luckiest 10

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Survival of the Luckiest 11

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Survival of the Luckiest 12

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Survival of the Luckiest 13

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Survival of the Luckiest 14

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Survival of the Luckiest 14.b

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-01 14:49 (UTC) - Expand

OP

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Survival of the Luckiest 15

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Survival of the Luckiest 16

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Survival of the Luckiest 17

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Survival of the Luckiest 18

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Survival of the Luckiest 19

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-02 22:06 (UTC) - Expand

NOT OP LOVES THIS FIC

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-03 08:36 (UTC) - Expand

Re: NOT OP LOVES THIS FIC

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-03 18:29 (UTC) - Expand

Survival of the Luckiest A/N

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Re: Survival of the Luckiest 19

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-03 18:33 (UTC) - Expand

Got a question for you, OP

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-01 02:37 (UTC) - Expand

OP

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-01 03:45 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Got a question for you, OP

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-03 19:05 (UTC) - Expand

^ Fill above. Derp.

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-03 19:13 (UTC) - Expand

Love and Truth [1b/?]

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-05 09:05 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Love and Truth [1b/?]

(Anonymous) - 2011-09-20 23:58 (UTC) - Expand

Work,work,work,work please

(Anonymous) 2011-07-27 02:04 am (UTC)(link)
http://oi51.tinypic.com/10nyfbq.jpg

Awkardness ensues. Altair/Malik.

Freudian Typo

(Anonymous) 2013-02-03 02:27 am (UTC)(link)
When his phone chimed, Malik flipped it over one handed and thumbed it unlocked. Altair, well good; he hadn't heard from him all day, and he was supposed to be doing errands.

yo, gimpy

hey

hey- i just picked up the car a second message follewed the first. i am gonna oil your ass up at 7 so be ready!

Malik snorted, glad he'd set down his drink to answer his roommate.

I always knew you wanted me.

[Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<lol.>') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.]

When his phone chimed, Malik flipped it over one handed and thumbed it unlocked. Altair, well good; he hadn't heard from him all day, and he was supposed to be doing errands.

<i>yo, gimpy</i>

<i> hey</i>

<i> hey- i just picked up the car</i> a second message follewed the first. <i>i am gonna oil your ass up at 7 so be ready!</i>

Malik snorted, glad he'd set down his drink to answer his roommate.

<i>I always knew you wanted me.</i>

<lol. Shut the fuck up man. Pick you up. Phone prob. </i>

Of course it was a phone problem. Altair couldn't be bothered to use it properly, for all he had a full key board. He was just sloppy and lazy.

<i>Whatever. Just be gentle with me honey </i> He put his phone down, and didn't answer the next buzz returning to work. It was half past six now, and he wanted to get the paperwork he was sorting done tonight.

It was a new car. That was why Altair had been excited. It was his first new car, and while white with a red leather interior was not exactly to Malik's taste, it did suit his friend completely. “What, no flowers?”

“Shut up.”

“I'm just saying that after a come on like that, you should at least buy a man flowers.” Malik slid into the passengers seat, and loosened his tie before buckling in.

“You're way too fixated on a typo.” Altair's driving was the reason that Malik would never consider going without a safety belt, but however close, he had to admit that he'd never hit anyone. Yet. Malik had to mental add as they whipped around a corner without slowing down.

“Then you're trifling with my delicate, maidenly virtue?”

“... what virtue? We've been roommates for ten years, Malik I know exactly how much virtue you have, and you could keep in in shoebox.” He was blushing oh this was far too entertaining to let die now. His face was pink, and getting darker, the color creeping down his face.

“I'll admit I'm not as squeaky clean as your own 'I'll only ever love one woman' self, but I'd hardly go that far.” He opened his mouth to make another joke, but had to clutch at the doorframe at another sharp turn.

“Damn it, Altair, stop driving like an idiot novice!” He glared over, to see that the flush had faded to a near dead white- not good given his friend’s normal skin tone. “I know you were planning on a whip around town and dinner out to celebrate your bonus and your new car- but I think we should go home.”

“Ah.. we can't.”

“What?”

“We can't. Fumigation.”

“Bullshit Altair. Home. Now, you look positively ill."

Altair made a weak groan in the back of his throat, but the next turn they made would bring them back to their apartment. Altair looked even more ill, and the sportscar slowed down. By the time they pulled into the garage for their building it was a crawl. Malik could have walked faster and he wouldn't have even been breathing hard. It only convinced him that there was something wrong. He had to pull him out of the car.

“I really think you're coming down with something...”

“I can only hope it's terminal.” Altair covered his face with both hands as Malik opened the door to the apartment.

There were flowers. And candles- not lit but present, the living room had been cleaned- not professionally well, but better than it had been in months. (Since the last cleaning lady quit) Music played softly on the stereo. It was... a love nest. Malik turned slowly and looked at Altair.

“Was I.... not the person you planned to bring back tonight? Because I like to get told ahead of time...”

“Actually” his friends voice sounded strangled. “You kind of <i>were</i>.” He flailed an arm at the set up. “i had it all planned out, I was gonna take you to dinner and then … and... and then I made that freudian typo, and then you wouldn't let up and now aaah fuck what was I thinking...” he grabbed the hood of his sweatshirt and yanked it up over his head, pulling it as low as it would go.

“I think...” Malik said after a long moment of silence. “That you are so far behind schedule, I'm going to have to change a few details.”

“What?” He grabbed the front of Altair's hoodie and pressed him up against the wall, kissing him firmly lips parting, coaxing Altair's open and tracing his tongue slowly on the inside of his lips.

“After all... it's after eight now. I'll have to do the oiling...”
The second kiss lasted longer.

--------
apologies if this isn't what the OP was looking for... and for the lack of porn.

Just a Bit Different

(Anonymous) 2011-07-27 03:06 am (UTC)(link)
I've seen a lot of hermaphrodite Leo (even one where he gets preggers! XD), but how about we go with the other side? Ezio is the hermaphrodite, and is capable of bearing children.

I love me some dom!Leo, and if that's incorporated in, I'll love you forever. I have a feeling that when Leo finds out, he'll be all curious and wanting to know how it works. And despite Leo not caring for the company of women in a sexual way, he can still perform with Ezio because he loves him. (Let's ignore anything that has to do with the new game and have Ezio have lotsa cute babies with Leo.)

Or if you want to pair Ezio with someone else, that's okay too.

Re: Just a Bit Different

(Anonymous) 2011-07-27 05:21 pm (UTC)(link)
This mpreg stuff makes me lol (no offense to any anons who really enjoy it, of course). Seconding because I want to see manly-as-fuck Ezio with a vagina.

OP: Just a Bit Different

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-28 00:27 (UTC) - Expand

Stolen

(Anonymous) 2011-07-27 04:21 am (UTC)(link)
So, in AC... Brotherhood, I think, you can hack the email. One of the sets of emails is Rebecca looking for her mp3, only for Shaun to find it on his night stand.

Yes, Shaun found it on his night stand, but who's to say he (or Rebecca) put it there?

Prompt: Desmond (or Lucy, but I don't see that happening very easily) took Rebecca's mp3, and, when they realized she was looking for it, framed Shaun.

Why? IDK, techno (or whatever music she listens to) drowns out the bleeding effect? Reminds them of home? Make something up, anon! I just want framed!Shaun.

R&R

(Anonymous) 2011-07-27 08:24 pm (UTC)(link)
The assassin's need a vacation, and Altair still can't swim.

Re: R&R

(Anonymous) 2011-07-28 04:44 pm (UTC)(link)
Lol! I'm all for this being filled!

Re: R&R

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-31 03:50 (UTC) - Expand

You are some creative people.

(Anonymous) 2011-07-27 10:05 pm (UTC)(link)
I'd like to see what you guys can do with this sentence:
I'M A BIRD, MOTHERFUCER, I'M A BIRD.
Like maybe the character of anon's choice gets totally wasted and jumps off something tall thinking they're a bird, or I don't know.
If you decide to use a dottore or Malfatto, I think this could be useful:
That mask isn't a plague mask - it's his face. >:U
If any of you are wondering, this is off some artist's comments on deviantART.

Re: You are some creative people.

(Anonymous) 2011-07-30 02:42 am (UTC)(link)
TOBUSCUS.

MSUT HAVE. PLEASE. MAYBE...

Mini-Fill: Birds Have Wings 1/2

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-30 22:52 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Mini-Fill: Birds Have Wings 2/2

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-30 22:53 (UTC) - Expand

High School Reunion...

(Anonymous) 2011-07-27 11:44 pm (UTC)(link)
So, Shaun (maybe Lucy, not so sure...) graduated from high school, right.

Duh. Of course.

So, my request is, several years down the road, the Templars have been fully defeated and everyone's happy and can live a normal life again (except for, you know, the occasional assassination).

What comes in the mail but an invite to a high school reunion.

Author!anon can have the assassins as well known or hidden still as they like, but the Templars are all gone.

Um... yeah...

Ritual Sex

(Anonymous) 2011-07-28 03:32 am (UTC)(link)
Oops! I commented on the wrong post!

The assassins at times seem pretty damn cultish with their finger burning rituals and whatnot. I see it only as logical that initiation requires some sort of ritual sex, be it alone or in front of the other assassins. I would prefer Ezio/Leonardo but any pairing would do. Maybe it involves kinky stuff like bloodplay or branding. Really this could any route including something extremely awkward because hell, maybe poor Uncle Mario is stuck watching.

Re: Ritual Sex

(Anonymous) 2011-07-28 06:38 am (UTC)(link)
MADE OF WIN.

Re: Ritual Sex

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Re: Ritual Sex

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-28 23:36 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Ritual Sex

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-29 18:09 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Ritual Sex

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-31 03:51 (UTC) - Expand

Salai + Ezio/Leonardo's kids = Fun~

(Anonymous) 2011-07-28 04:00 am (UTC)(link)
I know this probably won't be filled, but this anon will still try!

This anon would like to see Salai in a situation where he has to deal with Ezio/Leonardo's twin baby boys. I'd really like to see that the twins were born semi-late in Leonardo's/Ezio's lives and suddenly Salai has to raise them (Ezio in Constantinople? Leonardo dies from his stroke? The two are killed by Templars and Salai escapes with twins?) I'd especially like Salai to grow up from his flippant ways and raise the twins as his own.

If writer needs another situation, Brotherhood setting instead.

Uninvited Maturity 1

(Anonymous) 2011-07-28 05:16 pm (UTC)(link)
Salai clung to the shadows as Lucrezia passed. He licked his lips once, backed up a step, then sent the thieves he had to distract them. Then, in a flash, he was off, snagging the beautifully dyed pouch hanging on her hip. She screeched, and he disappeared into the alleyways, trekking to Leonardo’s old workshop. Slipping in, he jogged into the other room, listening to the cries of the two young boys. Never, in all his life, did he think he’d be grateful to say that he was one of La Volpe’s favorite thieves.

He threw the pouch onto the table and fixed two small plates of finger food, walking into the small room. This studio was so empty now that Leonardo was gone, despite the fact he had left it to his other apprentices. The artist made sure he had a place to stay to help take care of the twins while the others got on their feet. He walked in, exhausted, and set the tray down for the two two-year-olds. One of them shrieked, waddling over with the small stuffed animal Claudia had sewn for him, and the other watched with big blue eyes, clinging to another animal. Salai settled them down at the table, letting them eat as he collapsed in a chair

“Why am I even in charge of these two?”

“I don’t know,” Francesco Melzi growled from the doorway.

He smirked at the man. “Ah, you’re just jealous I’m supporting you right now.”

Melzi’s scowl deepened. “I don’t need your help. If you’re staying here, then you can at least take care of those two damn boys.”

Salai rolled his eyes, kicking back and nursing one. “Look, you’d know I’d be with La Volpe in a heartbeat, but I’m not because you don’t have money, so deal with it.”

“Since when have you been the good guy?”

Salai’s eyes narrowed, and he rose slowly. “If I left them to you, they’d be out on the street, and I refuse to let two helpless babies try to survive on the streets when I lived on them for several years before Leonardo took me in. I know how much you hated Leonardo’s relationship with Ezio.”

“Not a baby!” the loud one, Mario, shouted.

Melzi’s eyes narrowed, and his lips turned into a straight line. “So you do this to spite me. You are so immature.”

Salai kept his gaze until he felt the quieter one, Giovanni, tug on his pantleg. He picked him up and let him settle in his lap for his nap. Mario was still eating gleefully. They had both been named after Ezio’s relatives, and Ezio had almost named Mario “Federico,” but decided it was too close to him.

“Besides,” he said nonchalantly, “I’m the only one making profits here.”

“Illegally!”

“So? I’m still—”

“I see you were successful.”

He turned to the voice to see La Volpe emerge from nowhere, tossing Lucrezia’s purse in his hand.

“Of course, you thought otherwise?”

La Volpe smirked, sitting in one of the other chairs in the babies’ and his room. Melzi growled.

“What are you doing here?”

“I was checking to see if he was successful. I never should’ve worried.”

He opened the pouch and withdrew the key from inside. “Perfect. I’ll leave the purse itself with you.”

Salai nodded once. “Thanks.”

La Volpe rose, handing him the purse. “I’ll send word when I have your next assignment.”

He nodded, taking the purse and tucking it into his belt as he kissed Giovanni’s head. La Volpe watched him as he moved the child to the small bed he had once used to set the boy down, tucking him in as he slept. The other bed had been Melzi, who had taken Leonardo’s bed. Salai was rather glad: he didn’t particularly care to sleep in the same bed his maestro had died in, and he did have some comfortable sheets he had bought. Melzi looked less than pleased the older thief was still there, eyeing the money at Salai’s hip carefully.

“You’ve changed,” La Volpe noted, watching the other baby boy.

“Didn’t have much of a choice,” Salai murmured as Mario burped loudly, clapping his hands over his mouth. He started cleaning up the mess. “They’re too young to live on their own, and I knew Melzi wouldn’t care for them.”

“I’m surprised he didn’t hire a caretaker.”

Salai scoffed. “Who do you think bought him those clothes?”

Uninvited Maturity 1(the rest)

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-28 17:18 (UTC) - Expand

Error in Uninvited Maturity 1

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OC

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-28 21:54 (UTC) - Expand

Author's Note: Uninvited Maturity

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-29 02:55 (UTC) - Expand

Uninvited Maturity 2

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-29 16:00 (UTC) - Expand

Uninvited Maturity 3

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Uninvited Maturity 4

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-29 16:03 (UTC) - Expand

Uninvited Maturity 4 (the rest)

(Anonymous) - 2011-07-29 16:06 (UTC) - Expand

Re: Uninvited Maturity 4 (the rest)

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-01 05:14 (UTC) - Expand

1000 Awesome Things

(Anonymous) 2011-07-28 04:27 am (UTC)(link)
So, browsing the blog 1000awesomethings.com and stumble across #314 - Watching bartenders work really fast. (http://1000awesomethings.com/2011/02/07/314-watching-bartenders-work-really-fast/)

Is it sad that, in all my nerdiness, I immediately thought of Desmond?

So, 1000 Awesome Things and AC meet...

Please? IDK, some drabbles about the awesome things, finding the blog/book, I don't care...

Drinks are Better When They're on Fire

(Anonymous) 2011-08-27 03:40 am (UTC)(link)
~New site, plus really interesting prompt, equals a little something here. Also, I don't know why I put Shaun in here, because I'm not a fan of Shaun. Oh well.~

Shaun was trying his damn hardest not to look impressed.

I mean, it wasn't like it was a hard drink to make - just some liquor and soda; he couldn't believe the drink actually warranted a name - but Rebecca was staring, her eyes swinging this way in that to try and follow Desmond's movements.

"Okay, watch this - think I can get it in under thirty seconds?"

Shaun didn't bother to respond as the other man turned to them. He slammed two small cups down onto the table and cracked open a can of Sprite, letting it pour absent mindedly into one of the cups while he uncorked a bottle of Absinthe with one hand - the blue glass shining in the limited light of their kitchen space. He set the soda down, and there wasn't so much as a drop of condensation that had gotten onto the table.

As he tipped the 90 proof into its own glass, he pulled a box of matches and one more shot glass out from behind him. Shaun was reminded of a magician hiding cards up his sleeve.

The blue glass bottle slid up against the counter - keeping balance - and Desmond stuck the match so quickly it wasn't totally out of the question that his arm slicing through the air hadn't caused the spark. He was grinning now, even in the dim light of the fire's flame, that was obvious. He leaned down a bit, and let the edge of the burning stick kiss the surface of alcohol.

The glass almost seemed to burst into flames for a moment, before settling down to a small glow. He reached back to the shot of soda, and split the two ounces worth of carbonated sugar with the third, previously empty glass. Then he picked up the flaming Absinthe and quickly blew it out; pouring its remains into the two cups.

He pushed the shots forward, that ear-splitting grin still going on unchecked. Rebecca returned it and downed the given drink, while Shaun had to make a show out of examining and smelling the concoction before actually knocking it to the back of his throat. It burned like hell, and he tried not to sputter. Faintly in the background, he could hear the Bartending Prodigy telling teammate, "Wait till you see the cocktails I can make."

Re: Drinks are Better When They're on Fire

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-27 13:22 (UTC) - Expand

Dat Michelangelo.

(Anonymous) 2011-07-28 05:50 am (UTC)(link)
Anon just got done reading a hot kind-of-threesome between Leonardo, Ezio, and Michelangelo. Shit, I wish that man would've appeared in the game because it would've been hilarious.
But anyways, back to the prompt.
Do something with Michelangelo. Doesn't even have to be porn, but it has to of course have something to do with AC. P:
Bonus points if you throw in a bitch fight between Leo and Mikey.