Writeanon is a derp and misfired and doesn't know if kink meme etiquette says to repost it here or link it... welp.
I spent about as long thinking up the title as I did writing this and I said it once and I'll say it again, somebody better should fill this glorious prompt.
-- “How he does it, I’ll never know.”
“I mean, he wears a belt, but there’s nothing for it to hold on to.” Lucy raises an eyebrow at the unconscious man in the chair.
“Maybe all he needs to hold his pants up is in the front.”
“How unladylike, Rebecca.”
“Wouldn’t you know, Shaun?” Becca smirks over the Animus.
“It is not holding his trousers up.”
“Ha ha, I bet it’s Shaun’s ugly face that frightens them into staying on. ‘S happened before.”
“I beg your pardon?” There’s a clatter as a teacup is violently lowered.
“Enough about Shaun!”
“But really, how is it possible for a man’s ass to be that flat? It’s like… I don’t know.”
“A Macbook?” Lucy helpfully offers.
“Yeah! Desmond’s ass is flat as a Macbook.”
“Wouldn’t fit in an envelope, though, at least not anymore.” They high five.
Shaun snorts.
“Man, I have a deep respect for that belt. Protects us all from seeing Desmond’s flat ass day after day, with no help or thanks whatsoever.” Rebecca holds her headphones over her heart in mock reverence.
“And our jobs are difficult.” Lucy grins.
“Oh, shut up, will you? His arse is just fine, thank you.”
It's a board! It's a plane! It's Desmond's ass!
I spent about as long thinking up the title as I did writing this and I said it once and I'll say it again, somebody better should fill this glorious prompt.
--
“How he does it, I’ll never know.”
“I mean, he wears a belt, but there’s nothing for it to hold on to.” Lucy raises an eyebrow at the unconscious man in the chair.
“Maybe all he needs to hold his pants up is in the front.”
“How unladylike, Rebecca.”
“Wouldn’t you know, Shaun?” Becca smirks over the Animus.
“It is not holding his trousers up.”
“Ha ha, I bet it’s Shaun’s ugly face that frightens them into staying on. ‘S happened before.”
“I beg your pardon?” There’s a clatter as a teacup is violently lowered.
“Enough about Shaun!”
“But really, how is it possible for a man’s ass to be that flat? It’s like… I don’t know.”
“A Macbook?” Lucy helpfully offers.
“Yeah! Desmond’s ass is flat as a Macbook.”
“Wouldn’t fit in an envelope, though, at least not anymore.” They high five.
Shaun snorts.
“Man, I have a deep respect for that belt. Protects us all from seeing Desmond’s flat ass day after day, with no help or thanks whatsoever.” Rebecca holds her headphones over her heart in mock reverence.
“And our jobs are difficult.” Lucy grins.
“Oh, shut up, will you? His arse is just fine, thank you.”
“Like I said, you would know.”