Could he even…speak aloud what he was about to ask? To tell Giovanni to go and never come back? His heart clenched at the thought hard enough to suck the breath from him. Sure, he had cared for and had sex with people before, thinking it was that love people always spoke of. But then he had begun to realize how wrong he was, but in turn learned the hard way what happened when he opened himself to others in that way.
“What is wrong Ezio?” When he opened his eyes he found that Giovanni was kneeling next to his legs, eyes looking up in concern.
He was silent for a long time, watching Giovanni’s hand encircle one of his in comfort and support. He said it without thinking, trying to distance himself from the pain. “I think we should stop this relationship…”
Green eyes widened in surprise. The shock on his face turned to pain, then the pain turned to confusion. “What? Ezio, why?!” He acted like he wanted to continue, but bite his lip to keep himself from doing so.
“Because…you should not be saddled with an old man like me.” Giovanni tried to protest but Ezio stopped him. If he couldn’t say it now, he’d never be able to say it at all. “You are young, while I’m old. You should be out there having the time of your life. You should be able to meet a girl and settle down and have children. I shouldn’t force you to have to be with an old man.”
Giovanni remained silent. Common sense told Ezio that he was probably processing what had been just said. Irrational fear convinced him that the young man would leave without a world, never to be seen again. Instead, his hands just tightened around his own. “You think I would leave you because you’re older than me? When people are together I think it’s rarer that they are the exact same age, instead of older and younger…”
“That’s only a few years, not almost forty!”
“That still doesn’t matter! Ezio, I love you and everything that makes you Ezio.” He reached up to cup his cheek, but Ezio jerked his head away.
“You say that now….but what if you wake up days, weeks, years from now and you realize you want someone your old age? What will happen when I start going gray? Or if I start getting sick or weak or slow? Or just up and die with no warning from my age?”
The younger assassin reached up and forced Ezio to look at him. “I’ll say it simply: so what? I wouldn’t care, I wouldn’t even mention it. And you want to know why? Because that’s what I would do for you. That’s how you show love. If you’re wrinkly and grey you’d still be handsome, because you’re my love. And if you get weak and sick, or hurt like now, I’d take care of you, just like I’m doing right now. Just like I know you’d do for me.”
“So you’d just keep blowing off your friends for me Giovanni? You’ll give up fun?”
Giovanni nodded as understanding came into his eyes. Atleast he knew part of what brought this on. “You needed me more. Ezio, I have friends and family, but you are my most important. And don’t think I’ll leave you behind to go have fun. I’ll be dragging you everywhere, so much you’ll be sick of me.”
“But…” Ezio’s voice cracked, and he had no idea he had begun to cry until he saw that Giovanni’s thumbs came back wet after stroking his face. “What if you become sick of me? I’m just an old man, and you’re all I have. I can’t think of myself anymore. I have to think of you and take care of you. That means thinking of what’s best…”
“It might be what’s best…by other standards.” Giovanni stood, only to sit on Ezio’s laugh. He reached up and Ezio yielded as he drew the older assassin’s head to his shoulder. “If you think I should have children, then we’ll adopt. If you think you’re too old, then I’ll be your youth and you be my maturity.”
“You…truly don’t care that I’m old?”
Giovanni shook his head. “No, I don’t. I love you for you. I wouldn’t care if you were a king or a bum off the streets. Friend or foe, ordinary or special, dumb or brilliant. Ezio, I wouldn’t care if you were the pope himself or an annoying minstrel running the streets-“ Giovanni abruptly stopped, tilting his head to concentrate on the sudden thought.
Impervious Fragility 12/?
“What is wrong Ezio?” When he opened his eyes he found that Giovanni was kneeling next to his legs, eyes looking up in concern.
He was silent for a long time, watching Giovanni’s hand encircle one of his in comfort and support. He said it without thinking, trying to distance himself from the pain. “I think we should stop this relationship…”
Green eyes widened in surprise. The shock on his face turned to pain, then the pain turned to confusion. “What? Ezio, why?!” He acted like he wanted to continue, but bite his lip to keep himself from doing so.
“Because…you should not be saddled with an old man like me.” Giovanni tried to protest but Ezio stopped him. If he couldn’t say it now, he’d never be able to say it at all. “You are young, while I’m old. You should be out there having the time of your life. You should be able to meet a girl and settle down and have children. I shouldn’t force you to have to be with an old man.”
Giovanni remained silent. Common sense told Ezio that he was probably processing what had been just said. Irrational fear convinced him that the young man would leave without a world, never to be seen again. Instead, his hands just tightened around his own. “You think I would leave you because you’re older than me? When people are together I think it’s rarer that they are the exact same age, instead of older and younger…”
“That’s only a few years, not almost forty!”
“That still doesn’t matter! Ezio, I love you and everything that makes you Ezio.” He reached up to cup his cheek, but Ezio jerked his head away.
“You say that now….but what if you wake up days, weeks, years from now and you realize you want someone your old age? What will happen when I start going gray? Or if I start getting sick or weak or slow? Or just up and die with no warning from my age?”
The younger assassin reached up and forced Ezio to look at him. “I’ll say it simply: so what? I wouldn’t care, I wouldn’t even mention it. And you want to know why? Because that’s what I would do for you. That’s how you show love. If you’re wrinkly and grey you’d still be handsome, because you’re my love. And if you get weak and sick, or hurt like now, I’d take care of you, just like I’m doing right now. Just like I know you’d do for me.”
“So you’d just keep blowing off your friends for me Giovanni? You’ll give up fun?”
Giovanni nodded as understanding came into his eyes. Atleast he knew part of what brought this on. “You needed me more. Ezio, I have friends and family, but you are my most important. And don’t think I’ll leave you behind to go have fun. I’ll be dragging you everywhere, so much you’ll be sick of me.”
“But…” Ezio’s voice cracked, and he had no idea he had begun to cry until he saw that Giovanni’s thumbs came back wet after stroking his face. “What if you become sick of me? I’m just an old man, and you’re all I have. I can’t think of myself anymore. I have to think of you and take care of you. That means thinking of what’s best…”
“It might be what’s best…by other standards.” Giovanni stood, only to sit on Ezio’s laugh. He reached up and Ezio yielded as he drew the older assassin’s head to his shoulder. “If you think I should have children, then we’ll adopt. If you think you’re too old, then I’ll be your youth and you be my maturity.”
“You…truly don’t care that I’m old?”
Giovanni shook his head. “No, I don’t. I love you for you. I wouldn’t care if you were a king or a bum off the streets. Friend or foe, ordinary or special, dumb or brilliant. Ezio, I wouldn’t care if you were the pope himself or an annoying minstrel running the streets-“ Giovanni abruptly stopped, tilting his head to concentrate on the sudden thought.