asscreedkinkmeme | Kink Meme - Assassin's Creed pt.2

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assassin's creed

Kink Meme - Assassin's Creed pt.2

Assassin's Creed Kink Meme pt.2
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Welcome to the Brotherhood

∆ Comment anonymously with a character/pairing and a kink/prompt.

∆ Comment is filled by another anonymous with fanfiction/art/or any other appropriate medium.

∆ One request per post, but fill the request as much as you want.

∆ The fill/request doesn't necessarily need to be smut.

∆ Don't flame, if you have nothing good to say, don't say anything.

∆ Have a question? Feel free to PM me.

∆ Last, but not least: HAVE FUN!

List of Kinks
(Livejorunal) Archive
#2 (Livejournal) Archive
(Delicious.com) Archive
(Dreamwidth) Archive <- Currently active
Part 1
Part 3
Part 4
Part 5
Fills Only
Discussion

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The cake was a decadent looking chocolate vision. Three layers of rich chocolate cake with layers of chocolate ganache in between. It was covered with a thick layer of creamy icing. Grated pieces of chocolate --white and dark-- were spread out on the top and a little on the side. Each individually sliced piece had a dollop of whipped cream with a bright maraschino cherry on top.

Desmond had never wanted a single thing more in his life than he wanted that cake. He'd planned it out. Timing his plan to coincide with the varied schedules of the others. Carefully watching them and patiently waiting for the perfect time to go for it. Lucy was gone on a supply run, Rebecca had just started her hour long shower, and Shaun was safely wrapped up in somehting on his computer with a full and hot cup of tea.

The timing didn't get any better than that. With only one piece remaining, Desmond took his chance. Moving quickly but quietly in the kitchen. Getting a plate and fork and then carefully transferring the cake out of it's box. Days of planning, nights of wanting. It was all worth it.

For all of two seconds.

"What the fuck, man!?" Desmond actually growled as the plate was snatched away. His fork --left dangling in midair-- was spun and clenched in his fist menacingly as he rounded on his opponent.

Shaun held the plate and it's slice of cake away and shook his head with an exaggerated sigh. "I thought we went over this before, Desmond. Fat men don't get dessert."

"It's just one piece," Desmond protested. Eying the distance to the cake and calculating the odds of getting to it before Shaun dropped it on the floor. The numbers were perilously low. "And I'm not fat!"

"That roll of flesh spilling out of your jeans says otherwise," Shaun said as he looked at the cake. "Better yet, tell it to someone that hasn't seen how much trouble you have putting those jeans on."

"It's not that bad," Desmond hated that his words came out suspiciously close to a whine. Sure, his jeans were getting a little on the tight side, and he might --might!-- have a little problem putting them on in the mornings, but that was to be expected. Clothes shrank, especially when they had to be washed so often because you had nothing else to wear. Regular workouts between Animus sessions were also doing their bit as he started to gain muscle mass. "One fucking piece isn't going to kill me."

It was a lost cause though. Shaun wouldn't budge on the issue anymore than Lucy or Rebecca would. Especially not if he could show off just how much of a dick he was at the same time. Desmond wondered what his odds were of catching one forkful of the cake before it got dropped. Wondered if it was really worth the price the women would exact for it, because Shaun would of course tell them all about it.

"No. You are on a diet until that excess fat goes away. Which means," Shaun grinned then because he was a son of a bitch, "no cake for you."

And then, because he was a sadistic son of a bitch, he snagged the fork out of Desmond's hand and walked off with the plate. Humming in obvious enjoyment as he ate it. "Asshole!"

Fat men don't get dessert.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA this is the most perfect fucking misfire fill ever.

Fat men get steamed veggies, low fat yoghurt, and water for their meals. They might get a small slice of whole wheat bread with a little bit of peanut butter if they do a really good workout before dinner.

Shaun is such a hypocrite.

He is the flabbiest member of the team.

Shaun's a little ticked that the women have used the diet to force those horrid steamed veggies on them all. He takes his revenge where he can.

When I realized I misfired I had no idea something this GLORIOUS would come out of it. Thank you for turning my mistake into a deliciously filled lie. And now I won't misfire EVAH AGAIN. I hope.

That's right you better have learned your lesson! Mistakes lead to funny fills and that's why you should never make mistakes! ...wait that doesn't sound right.

So I SHOULD purposely misfire to get amazingly amazing misfire-fills? WHUT? ._.
Actually, that dosen't seem like a bad idea.... WHUT? ._.

HILARIOUS.

Also, I want to hug Desmond and bake him another cake because I'm an enabler.

You might want to be careful of that. He's been deprived fir so long there's no telling what he'd do. Fir the cake or even to it.

lmao

Desmond Miles: Cake-fucker Extraordinaire.

Ok, ya know what? Totally gonna prompt this.

LOL! Love this!
And that one bit about tight pants reminded me of this:
http://doubleleaf.deviantart.com/gallery/?q=tight+pants#/d2tez6i

Captcha says: natifew kingdoms
You offer me not a few kindgoms? Why, thank you! You are too kind!

Someone should make a comic with Desu-Desu going "nyoron" when he's denied access to the cake.

I can just imagine him going like that and he's so pathetic it's so cute~ X3

Great job writeranon!

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Kink Meme - Assassin's Creed pt.2

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Fail!Anon here...

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