asscreedkinkmeme | Kink Meme - Assassin's Creed pt.3

trololol,
write anon's glad someone will read this :D

It's coming along very nicely XD

I hope this isn’t too horrible
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Pilot Chapter: Ezio Auditore against the World

“Guess who’s drunk?!” Desmond’s voice slurred as he slammed the door to the tiny bungalow that he shared with his cousin.

A lump under a mountain of blankets groaned, “I guess Desmond,” the bulge groaned from the small double bed.

Desmond gleefully jumped on the bed, ignoring the pained groans from the bed’s original inhabitant. “YOUU guessed RIGHT!”

With a grunt, Ezio shoved his younger cousin off of him. “God Desmond, do you know what time it is??... Wait are you even old enough to drink?”

“Soo… How is my cousin Ezio?” Desmond answered, completely ignoring the older male’s questions.

The Italian rubbed his face, trying to get the sleep out of his eyes. “I’m ok,” he said with a sigh. “I went to this party with Antonio and his gang… Well, I saw this guy… And I feel like I keep seeing him. God, I feel like such a stalker because I saw him once at the library and …”

“Ooooh~,” Desmond chuckled. “Library. Can I pretend we’re talking about Shaun?”

“Sure,” Ezio replied off-handedly, focused too much on telling his story. “So, when I’m at the party, what the hell, there he is!”

Desmond let out a thoughtful hum. “Shaun wouldn’t go to a party that had “Antonio’s crowd”.”

“Anyways, I think… I’m in love,” Ezio stated, his eyes bloodshot. “But-”

This revelation had Desmond snapping up, staring at his cousin with wide eyes. “…What?” he gasped. “Ezio Auditore, infamous playboy, screwer of anything that has legs, man-”

“That’s enough!” Ezio furiously shouted.

…It was ignored. “-whore, sexual predator, is in love?! With someone he hasn’t even talked to once?!”

“Hey!” the Auditore snapped. “I talked to him! I asked him for the time when we met at the library! Anyways, let me finish!”

“…Ok…”

“Anyways, I think I’m love but something’s bothering me…”

“…Whaaat?”

“It’s…. He was…. He was wearing this hat!” Ezio said, rubbing his temples. “This haunting hat and….”

Desmond rolled his eyes. Sometimes his cousin was so dramatic! “What did this hat look like??”

“It looked…. Really awkward… It was bright red.”

Desmond sighed loudly. “Not that you weren’t descriptive enough or anything, but do you mind drawing me the hat?” the drunk one asked while passing his cousin paper and a pen.

Ezio silently took the items and began sketching. It took 5 minutes to sketch and another 10 minutes “to edit” before the older male deemed it presentable enough.

Taking the offered paper, Desmond focused on it- well focused on it as much as someone drunk could. “…Ezio,” he growled. “……This is a picture of your favorite shirt…”

Throwing the paper to the general direction of the trashcan, Desmond said. “What’s the big deal? If you don’t know for sure that you love him, just ask him out and see what happens! Wait………. Don’t tell me……….. I know what’s going on………… You don’t know his name!!”

Ezio smacked Desmond on his back. “Who do you take me for?” he snorted, his teeth bared. “Of course I know his name!”

“Well… What is it?”

The love that filled Ezio next words could burn unicorns with its sweetness. “Leonardo de Vinci…”
~~~~~~~
Just a pilot chapter to see if this is ok… OTL
Oh God… Desmond….. Let’s just pretend his gayness comes out when he’s drunk….
I’ll get writing more once my midterm’s done….

I'm, wow. I'm in shock. This was awesome! It was everything I wanted, plus more (How did you know I love Des/Shaun writeanon?)
And that last line! It was so wonderful! You have made my day anon!!!

P.S. Forgot to mention in original prompt, but feel free to put whatever other pairings in this.

Yusuf/Ezio. Something somewhat sweet, perhaps after hours at Assassin HQ.

Thank you QuQ I'm glad you enjoyed ! Now that I read it over though, I realized that I wrote Leo's name wrong D: . Next part will be coming around Thursday :D

This is nice *-* I liked it, poor Ezio, livinng with what's been happening to him.

Not so much a drabble...I got a bit carried away, lol! Also, I'm incapable of writing crack, so here's a totally serious Talal/Leo!
Ah, Apple shenanigans. Y U so convenient?

It really is very kind of Ezio to lend him the Apple for studying, Leonard muses. And while the Assassin gave him a very clear description of its dangers, he can't help but consider the warning frivolous. If he can decipher ancient puzzles to build miniature cannons, and construct machines enabling flight, surely this orb (small enough to sit in the palm of his hand!) poses no threat. Humming absently, he paces around the table on which Ezio left the Apple. Before attempting any experiments, he wishes to observe, and sketch. Reaching for a sheet of parchment, he pauses. Looking is all very well, but if he is to understand, he must touch. Surely there is no risk there, and he may be able to deduce what material it was made from. Hesitantly, he reaches towards the orb, noting that it seems to pulse slightly, its glow growing brighter the closer he gets.

He stops, left index finger inches away from the Apple. Ezio did say to be careful; he cannot quite remember the exact wording.
Leonardo, I give you the Apple for the purpose of observation only. It's dangerous. Look only. If you try anything creative, so help me, I'll...
No, he simply can't recall Ezio's warning. Probably he should have paid more attention. Shrugging, he bridges the gap, and places a fingertip against the Apple's surface.
His first thought is that the Apple is warm, without any visible reason for it to be so. His mind whirrs, trying to work out what kind of chemical reaction could have caused such a reaction.

His second thought is much less vague. Instead, he howls in shock as the Apple's golden glow spreads, encompasses him and blocks out his workshop. He tries to pull away, but it seems he is stuck. Possibly Ezio had been serious in his warning...

Abruptly, the light clears, and Leonardo finds himself clasping the Apple close to his chest (he doesn't remember how that happened, but his mind is so unruly these days). It no longer glows gold, and appears to be nothing more than a strange piece of metalwork. Interesting. Possibly it needs to recuperate energy? Leonard tears his attention away from it for a moment and notices that he is standing...somewhere.
It's hot; he feels beads of sweat forming on his forehead. The sun is unreasonably bright; he squints up at it in irritation, and then notices the architecture. Based on the sketches he has seen in those mysterious codex pages...surely it cannot be Jerusalem?

"How fascinating!" he breathes, tentatively approaching the edge of what seems to be a rooftop to stare down at dusty streets that very definitely do not belong in Italia.
"Stop there". The harsh command comes from behind him, and makes him jump. A startled yelp, as he discovers exactly how close he is to the edge of the roof. Leonardo mentally assesses his position, and decides maintaining dignity is no longer a primary concern. Instead, he elects to madly wind-mill his arms in a desperate attempt to avoid splattering all over the distant street. Thankfully, a hand grabs the back of his shirt, and hauls him back to safety.

Turning to thank his saviour, Leonardo notes that he appears to be a native, and that he is clearly caught between irritation and amusement. Even at this inappropriate time, Leonardo notes the man's striking features, darker, wilder than the pale, nervous noblemen he is accustomed to "meeting" at Teodora's. Although perhaps he should focus his attention on more pressing matters. The lethal-looking bow he carries, or the quiver of pointy arrows. A rooftop guard, perhaps?
"Signore, you have saved me! I'm terribly grateful." Too late, it occurs to him that, if he is correct in his deduction of his current time and place, he will not be understood.

It seems the Apple possesses a variety of talents, however. The stranger's gaze turns threatening, and Leonardo has the distinct impression of being eyed by a rather large, hungry predator. One of those huge felines he has seen sketches of, perhaps (what are they called? It annoys him that he cannot recall).

While his mind races, Leonardo barely notices that he is babbling. It's a terrible habit, whenever he's nervous or inspired, he speaks whatever random nonsense comes to mind.
"My name is Leonardo, I am an engineer and artist, it's lovely to meet you, I appear to have been transported here from Italy, and isn't this all exciting?"

This time, the other man actually laughs. "Stranger, if I did not know what that orb was, I would call you a madman, and imprison you. As it is, I doubt 'exciting' is the word you seek".
Leonardo stops speaking. The stranger is not dressed as an assassin, and besides, if he has guessed the time correctly, very few assassins know of the Pieces of Eden's existence yet. And a random rooftop guard would not know. Which can only mean...
"Oh my. You must be one of those nine Templars".
Thankfully, the bow (which was being pointed in a worrying direction) is lowered.
"I am Talal. My trade is slavery, and I am indeed a Templar."
Though he realizes it's probably a bad idea, Leonardo cheerfully steps forward, grabs Talal by his shoulders, and kisses his cheeks in greeting. Ignoring the mildly horrified expression he receives in return, he maintains his happy chattering on what an opportunity this is, and would it be alright if he asked some questions, or maybe many, many questions, and then could he possibly sketch Talal, because he has never seen a man quite so striking, and he means this in the best possible way.

It seems Talal has decided he is not a serious threat, merely an entertaining oddity. He beckons Leonardo towards a ladder. "Very well. We will speak more, and then I will decide what to do with you. You would fetch a significant price on the market..." he reaches out and tugs on a strand of Leonardo's blonde hair. "Or perhaps I will keep you for my own."

***

Sprawled among large, comfortable cushions some time later, Leonardo reflects that it's all very well he paid no attention to Ezio's warnings. The Apple lies abandoned on another cushion a few meters away, and he notes that its golden glow is slowly returning. He assumes it needs to regain some sort of energy before taking him home again. No matter. He is naked and happy, his head resting in a tanned, muscled lap while fingers caress his hair absently. There is still plenty of time to make that sketch. It will cheer one of his bedroom walls up nicely, he decides.

Wow, this sounds awesome! Hope someone takes it.

YES. ANON, you have me hooked. I was hoping that this wouldn't really happen, but now I have this wonderful little ficlet with Talal and Leonardo (I did read the second part, I promise), and now I'm addicted. Thank you. This is great.

I don't even mind that it isn't crack. I'm surprised a serious fill came from it. Thank you, anon. It seems almost a shame it's over. You are an excellent writer, anon, and I love how you have Talal find him absolutely amusing over alarming. Thank you~

Anon, these are wonderful. Thank you. I love, above them all, the Vidic/Christina one, it just sends... shivers up my spine. Vidic is just... Thank you. That was wonderful.

And ~~"oneshelovedonewhofailedtosaveher"~~ This... this was... so sad. Thank you, anon.

And the Becca/Volpe one made me laugh. XDDDD I loved it. They would make an impossible to catch team, wouldn't they? Thank you so much for these wonderful fills!

sorry, that was the op. Oops...

When Desmond popped into the sewers to brush his teeth, he certainly wasn’t expecting anything to happen. No, not really. Perhaps watch a sewer rat swim around, perhaps watch water drip and cause ripples. Nothing exciting. Nothing. He was especially not expecting to have Shaun’s tongue down his throat in the early hours of the morning, a mouthful of foamy toothpaste dribbling everywhere, and feeling the trail of the toothpaste his brush left behind as he ran his hands up Shaun’s shirtless back.

And he most certainly didn’t expect to find the entire thing utterly arousing. He could feel the foam dripping down his chest, Shaun’s hands firmly entangled in his hair, and when Shaun pressed against him, he groaned as the toothpaste was smeared between their bodies. He wasn’t even focused on that wicked tongue that was intent on thoroughly taking his mouth, but the taste of the toothpaste mixing with the strong flavor of Shaun’s tea, and the mint seemed to work just right. His toothbrush was pressed against Shaun’s shoulder blade, clattering to the floor after he moved his hands just enough without caring about it, and Shaun pulled back.

Shaun was panting, his eyes still closed as he caught his breath, toothpaste smeared all over his chin and chest. Desmond wondered how he managed to look so much cleaner than he did, and when Shaun turned around and went to wipe the toothpaste off, Desmond snarled. He grabbed Shaun’s wrist, pinning him to the wall of the sewers, the other man’s eyes wide and fully awake now.

“You think you can get away with that?” Desmond growled, pressing Shaun against the wall and grinding his hips against him. “You fucking think you can get the fuck away with that?”

Shaun made a quiet little gasp as Desmond picked him up and kept him pinned. His legs wrapped around his waist, and he snarled when Shaun looked at him again, shuddering. He kissed him, violently, not enjoying being teased quite so insistantly, and he took control of the kiss, loving the feel of the toothpaste foam squishing against their skin and the taste of the mint tea he now had.

When he felt someone else walk in, he turned, glaring at the person. It was Lucy. She looked utterly shocked, taking in how debauched Shaun looked and they still had their pants on. Her toothpaste and toothbrush were dangling precariously in her grip, and he snarled. She jolted, backing up a pace.

“You-you look like a rabid animal.”

Desmond snorted, his eyebrows narrowing as she continued to back up. Before he could check to make sure she left the sewers, he had his tongue in Shaun’s mouth again, Shaun’s hands working at his jeans as Desmond’s fingers gripped his ass tightly to keep him up. It probably would’ve helped if he could quit grinding against him for just a moment.

Of course, he was too distracted by the toothpaste smeared between them and the taste of the kiss.

This was a good morning.

You're quite welcome OP. To be honest, once I saw Volpe/Becca, I was immediately reminded me of all the heist movies/shows I've ever seen. Now my mind is, quite without my permission, trying to create this AU world where these two are the greatest criminal duo ever.

As for Vidic, well... writing Warren comes very easily to me. I almost wanna say I could write him in any kind of situation, but that might be tempting fate.

And Adha's story is just a sad one through and through. Though I tried to end it on a hopeful note.

Are there any other crack pairings that you didn't list in your original prompt you want me to try and take a 'crack' at?

~~I swear the 16/Rauf prompt is lookin' at me. Don'tmakeeyecontact, don'tmakeeyecontact...~~

Blarg. I feel silly now.

can't wait for more!!! :D

I will be F5-ing this prompt >:)!

Show Altair your sass, Malik~!!!!

Doooooooooooo eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeet. 16/Rauf is calling you.

... uh... the crackiest Desmond pairing you can think of? I only said Sibrand because it was the first thing I thought of. Perhaps... I dunno... one of the multiplayer characters? Abbas?

I made eye contact.

-----

They s-sent him back. All-all-all-all the way b-b-back. To the the beg-g-in-ing. The beginning. WHY DID THEY DO THAT?

“Altair?”

Now he’s-I’m-we’re reliv-iving memories. Gotta find it gottafinditappleappleapple-

“It seems my students do not know how to wield a blade.”

Ninety-two? Twelve-lve s-s-sixty three. One-one-nine-oh! Where am I? WHEN?

“Perhaps you can show them?”

I-I-I-I know th-that voice-ce. That phrase. I know w-when this is.

“Of course Rauf.” My left hand lacks a ring finger, the same as the white robed man requesting my help. He is the Weapon’s Master of the Masayf Assassins, which means I am… I am-

A figure, racing at me. There’s a sword in my hand, and I raise it. The metal clashes. Ringing when my opponent is disarmed. I put the point to his throat.

“And that is how you wield a blade!”

Leave the ring, leave the novice lying there ~~in a pool of blood-~~

“Thank you Altair. Will you show them anything else?”

The novice stands and walks out of the ring. Unharmed ~~covered in blood~~ ~~reachingoutforme-~~

Wh-what is-S-s-s REAL?

“No, I have important matters that need tending to.” He’s standing in front of me, looking disappointedangrysadindifferent -NO! No, he’s disappointed but he shrugs it off because he’s an Assassin. This h-here, no-ow, it’s what-t’s real. Live in the-the now.

“Perhaps another time.”

“Rauf.” He stops. Looks back at me-him-us-who? Looking, looking for- “Thank you.”

“For what?”

Weapon’s Master of the Masayf Assassins. Eleven ninety. That means I am Altair Ibn La’Ahad.

I kno-KNOW who I a-am.

“Reminding me.” I wave my hand ~~the knife falls~~ ~~sheheshe screams-~~

what is real

...Jeet Kun Do was a martial arts style invented and taught by Bruce Lee, who although was a brilliant martial artist and actor was not a Shaolin monk.

Nevertheless I do understand what you mean. You're making the connection in martial arts between my prompt and a personal memory trying to show your appreciation and I thank you for it.

If you'd like to learn a bit more you could Google 'Myths and Logics of Shaolin Monks' or search for it in Youtube to learn a bit more.

Thanks, I was thinking about expanding on it, but I would have to see if I had the time. Like maybe Frederico's point of view in contrast.

A wooden door was just an inanimate object. It was harmless, and yet... standing there, holding all of his worldly possessions, that wooden door transformed itself into the gateway to Hell.
He couldn't bring himself to knock.
Closing his eyes and taking a breath, he... couldn't do it.
"Malik, what are you doing?"
Whipping around, the young man found the owner of the room standing behind him. Malik could feel the blood run to his face as he coughed nervously.
"W-Waiting for you! Do you know how long I've been out here? Open the door!"
The eagle chuckled and stepped forward to invite his fiancee in. The room was larger than what Malik was used to and filled with empty spaces.
Altair coughed awkwardly, drawing Malik's attention, "You can just set your things anywhere. I'll help you unpack tomorrow."
It was already late and the castle was quiet. Time for bed.
The younger assassin looked at his future-partner nervously. "I'll see you in the morning then. Good night Altair," he mumbled and proceeded to make a make-shift bed out of the pillow and blanket he brought from his own room.
"Stop."
Malik halted and looked back up at the hooded figure.
Altair felt nervous, but hid the feeling behind a smirk, "My fiancee won't sleep by himself. You're going to share my bed. I will not accept no for an answer."
Malik instantly paled and went rigid. Sleeping with Altair? Allah, have mercy.
---------------------------
It had taken them several minutes of awkward shifting and shimming to finally find comfortable positions in their shared bed.
Altair turned to look at the man next to him and sighed. The agony on Malik's face was obvious. He didn't want to be here.
Maybe...a little....
Slowly, Altair took Malik's warm hand into his and let out a sigh of relief when the other didn't pull away. He squeezed gently, hoping to convey some of what he was feeling with the gesture. Malik scoffed and turned on his side, facing the opposite direction, hiding the slight smile on his face.
------------------------------------
The next morning found the two assassin's snoring rather loudly, drooling all over their pillows, and wrapped tightly in each other's arms.
A rooster's crow awoke the pair with a start and as they lay there, blissfully unaware of the morning wood they both sported, everything seemed normal. Like a normal couple.
Unfortunately, the moment was ruined when they finally blinked the sleep from their eyes and turned bright pink.
"I think I'll go...to the restroom."
And with that, Altair dashed from the room as quickly as he could. Malik sighed with relief dropped his head in his hands.
What was he doing?

Sorry, forgot to change the title. Please enjoy!

LJ this is getting ridiculous. Where the #$^@#$%^&@#$^ is my FILL??

Wow, thank you! It's actually scary how much fun I had with it. For some reason, they were really easy to write... by the power of CRACK, I declare this pairing LEGIT.

I do know that Jeet Kun Do is a more recent martial art and was created by Bruce Lee, sorry if it sounded like I was referring to it like it was a Shaolin art/teachings. ^^;; Not my intent at all, and thanks for understanding what my introverted brain was trying to convey.

I mostly referred to that scene because my brain substituted the monk for Spike, and Ezio for Spike's "student," and seeing Ezio getting knocked on his ass/back several times as he tries to learn from the monk. :D It was epic lulz in my head.

Thanks for the point in a direction for learning more about Shaolin monks, I'll check it out when I have time (and maybe a plot!bunny will bite. Who knows?)

Kink Meme - Assassin's Creed pt.3

Re: tentative claimer has a question

Ezio Auditore against the World

OP Here!

no subject

write anon

OP! anon

Talal/Leonardo

Re: Talal/Leonardo

Re: Altair h/c

TalxLeo OP

Becca/Volpe, Vid/Christina, Adha/Erudito

OP above^

Foamy Mint Tea

Re: Becca/Volpe, Vid/Christina, Adha/Erudito

^WriteAnon Above

Re: You're My Everything 2/???

Re: ^WriteAnon OP

Mini-Fill: 16/Rauf

Re: Warrior monk in Venezia?

Re: OP! anon

Re: You're My Everything 2/???

You're My Everything 3/???

Re: NINJA COMMENTS

Re: TalxLeo OP

Re: Warrior monk in Venezia?