asscreedkinkmeme | Kink Meme - Assassin's Creed pt.3

Entry tags:

assassin's creed

Kink Meme - Assassin's Creed pt.3

Assassin's Creed Kink Meme pt.3
Fill Only

Get out of my bureau!

☃ Comment anonymously with a character/pairing and a kink/prompt.

☃ Comment is filled by another anonymous with fanfiction/art/or any other appropriate medium.

☃ One request per post, but fill the request as much as you want.

☃ The fill/request doesn't necessarily need to be smut.

☃ Don't flame, if you have nothing good to say, don't say anything.

☃ Have a question? Feel free to PM me.

☃ Last, but not least: HAVE FUN!

List of Kinks
(Livejorunal) Archive
#2 (Livejournal) Archive
(Delicious.com) Archive
(Dreamwidth) Archive <- Currently active
Part 1
Part 2
Part 4
Part 5
Fills Only
Discussion

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

The sun was high and Antonio cursed at it-the heat he could handle but the sun, the mutinous sun made him growl at it with irritation. And it smelled. He could say with confidence that he had never smelled something as awful as Venice's canals, wealthy and peaceful as the city was. It made him gag whenever he had to pass over a bridge but at the very least he could hide his reaction from his teammates for the most part when they weren't complaining themselves about the stench.

“If people would stop dumping their shit into the canals it would stink less,” another militia muttered to himself.

“If you would all shut up it would feel less shitty to be here,” yet another said over his shoulder.

“Engage in your games all you like, bastardo, but it will not help anyone,” the first shoved the man in front of him and Antonio wondered who had thought that it would be a good idea to travel in such a tight pack in a hot and smelly place as Venice.

Before a fight had a chance to break out their leader grabbed them both and smacked their heads together, “stai zitto, stronzi. May that knock some sense into your senseless heads.”

The two stumbled back, clutching their foreheads and yelling swears at their leader. Antonio wondered where they had gotten the coglione to take a tone with a higher ranking man but he said nothing, resisting the urge to wring his hands. He had heard the stories of what they did to men who spoke out of turn and he had no interest in being killed. Especially not by some sort of lottery system. We are more likely to kill each other than to be murdered by any assassin. That has to be a tale someone has made up and even if it were not he is not here anyway. Regardless, he did not expect to be spending much time alone-it is better to be safe rather than sorry even if these idiots are more liability than ally.

They followed a patrol route outlined by the head of the militia that took them through the Castello district and to the outskirts of San Marco then back again as if any of the men in the group would be completing the entire trip every day. Within twenty minutes I saw two guards lounging on benches and talking to the courtesans. To say Venice was not what he had been expecting would be an understatement. But he would be paid and provided with a place to sleep so he could find no true faults with working in the city; peaceful or not.

~~**~~

Eating should have been a peaceful experience. Should have been. Is not. The other men had taken to throwing scraps of food at each other like children to stealing each others' toys. He thought it had ended when an olive pit smacked him in the side of the face. It had spit on it and clung wetly to his face for a moment before falling to the table. He opened his mouth to yell for the culprit to show himself but the man in question removed the need for such things after proudly crowing that the hit had counted as 100 points.

Then he nodded at Antonio with a stupid smirk, “you are from Florence?”

“And what if I am, stronzo?”

The man popped another olive into his mouth and elbowed the man in the seat next to him, “told you.”

If he hadn't made a promise to himself that he wouldn't get himself killed he would have fought him in an instant but as it stood he had made that promise and so stayed firmly rooted to his chair. His mouth on the other hand remained willing to argue even if he couldn't physically fight. “What do you have against Florence?”

“Nothing,” a light shrug, “you just seem Florentine.”

I can see my thoughts are wasted on him. I doubt he has any of his own to begin with. With that he went back to eating even despite the bastard continuing to spit his pits at him. If one of us has to be killed as an example, God, make it him.

--

In case you didn't catch it olive spitting man was making a gay joke because Florence is super gay. Antonio actually DOES come from Florence though. XDD I'll try to update this twice a day when I can because as it stands now nobody will be making out in alleys for awhile and I don't want you to have to wait too long for the gay, OP! ; D ()

Florence is super gay!!!! :---D AC2 never the same again!
Needless to say, OP is super happy and waiting for more!

Ha ha ha it is! xD Gay statues everywhere. I was going to delete this and change it but since you like it I'll keep it for now ha ha!

They rose with the sun or at least most of them did. He noticed a couple of men laying about on their bedrolls still dead asleep and stepped over them. The barracks where they would be staying until they got their own rooms ideally stood in the midst of the Castello district with the personal guards of the Barbagio staying in the lower bowels of the Castello. I hope they do not intend to make me one of those. If they are targets of the assassino I want nothing to do with them. Halfway through the thought he realized he had started to regard the assassin as real though he knew nothing in particular about him. Back in Florence they had said he was the son of a banker who had been killed but those were likely just stories for minstrels to write stupid songs about.

After using the bathroom he donned his uniform; a long sleeved shirt with green and black stripes, a pair of heavy pants and leather armour, on his head he placed a green beret. He looked utterly stupid. His own mother would have laughed. After glancing at the others though he didn't feel so bad. Besides, he was there to do a job not look like the subject for a painting. Also he didn't want to preen too much lest he hear more calls of “Florentiiine”. It began to get out of hand when they all refused to sleep near me. And it is all that bastardo's fault.

Again the sun sat high in the sky and he wanted to complain to someone about it however seeing as the others gave him a wide berth other than when they wanted to get close for the laughs he kept his mouth shut. It felt like childhood all over again. The taunts, the desire to duel just about everyone around him and the lack of a backbone to actually do anything about it. God, maybe he should have just given up and apprenticed to some old man back in his youth and learned to do something useful like painting or carving or making armour for idiots like the ones he currently lived and worked with. Their leader for the most part seemed to play the part of ass kisser to anyone of higher rank than himself rather than mediator and 10 minutes into their training Antonio already felt boredom taking hold. Why hadn't he just gotten married to some farm girl and become a farmer? Twenty already and without a wife-there had to be something wrong with him. He sincerely hoped the other men were bachelors as well. If a woman can put up with them then why not me? My mother will not wait much longer for children and I am tired of giving her excuses. He thought of her lined face and how her hair had gone grey and the smile that she gave when he so much as looked at a woman. ...My own mother thinks I am...

“Stop thinking of men and hurry up!” olive spitter called back to him from the back of the pack and Antonio jumped forward into the ring.

Despite never having held a sword for longer than twenty minutes in his life he managed to not be killed by the perhaps slightly overzealous arms master who looked close to death himself with scars covering his face. The grizzled man helped him to his feet after he fell flat on his back for the 3rd time and proposed that perhaps he should look into using a spear because anyone who got close to him would be sure to kill him with such mediocre skills as he possessed. Antonio became certain that all of Venezia hated him and wished to see him dead and he doubted anyone could convince him otherwise.

The rest of the day went much like how the first had-slowly with random outbursts of fighting though he managed to stay out of it. His life in Venice was sure to be as interesting as the one he had led back in Florence and he almost wished he could be as stupid as the others. They at least appear to be having some sort of fun even if it is because they have something wrong with their heads.

“There something wrong with you?”

--

Guess which kind of guard Antonio's nemesis is. ; D Ha ha

OP is curious. What type of guard Antonio is?

Antonio is a Seeker. They're just in training right now but in the next chapter it'll become more obvious what kind of guard he is. : D ...Mostly cause he'll be hauling around a spear ha ha!

The body plummeted to the earth and landed with a loud crunch at his feet. Even before anyone could shout blood pooled around its head, legs and arms facing in all directions like some sort of imitation of a pinwheel. Antonio could only stare as he stepped back from the puddle of blood making a path for his boots. Its eyes seemed to fixate on him.

“Big surprise as to who has never seen a dead body before!” the taunting broke through the wall of numbness that had enclosed him but he still stayed rooted to his spot.

The screams of the citizens rang in his ears.

“Do you not have dead people in Florence?”

“Fuck off,” he muttered, eyes still trained on the dead man until their leader grabbed him by the arm and yanked him away.

“You, go up there and see what happened. You, shut those people up,” Antonio barely saw the finger jabbing at the crowd had formed, his mind not wrapping around the fact that he was meant to calm them. When he got shoved in their direction he blinked and opened his mouth to give them some sort of explanation. But no words came. The largest of them, a man with more armour than brains pushed him out of the way to deal with the civilians.

“Ey, there is no one up here! Idiot probably fell taking a shortcut!” he hadn't noticed that the irritating man who he had heard called Bruno had even climbed up to the rooftop overlooking the Piazza di San Marco. Seeing the carnage caused by someone falling from such a building Antonio found he couldn't wish it on anyone. Even if that man made him angrier than anyone he had met here so far. A week into his stay in Venice and already he had a rival of sorts in him. They had sparred during training and they fist fought everywhere else once it ended after the teasing got too much. At least we have not been caught yet...

“Who would be stupid enough to take a shortcut on the rooftops, stronzo?” he yelled up to him. What kind of idiot even did that?

“I did not say I was an expert, bastardo, only that my theory is that!”

The assassino? Could he have done it? His eyes scanned the roofs of the buildings-there was no way he could have gotten anywhere near the Doge's palazzo but the others were accessible to anyone if Bruno could climb them.

“You think the assassin did it.”

He nearly punched him in the face for sneaking up on him but considering how their berets had been traded for helmets that would have been a bad idea. All he needed was to break his hand on the asshole's face.
“You have heard that he is in Venezia, why would you not?”

“Because you worry more than my mother,” a pat on the back marked the last of their social interaction for the moment because Bruno turned away from him and started discussing a dice game with one of the other men. After the rather sparse amount of official training they had split up into groups of four rather than eight. Antonio, Bruno and 2 others had the morning patrol which everyone else but him complained about.

They sent Bruno ahead-infuriatingly enough with Antonio lagging behind him-to fetch a doctor and priest for the dead man. Why me? We do not even get along and they force me to run behind him like some sort of dog?/

“Stop running so quickly!”

“It is not my fault you wore so much armour you cannot run properly!” he turned around even, jogging backwards as if to taunt his slow pace even more, "and what are you trying to prove with a spear like that?"

"and what are you trying to prove with a spear like that?"
I totally lolled at that :--D

I love how they tease Antonio because he is from Florence :--D

“I have nothing to prove! For a man who tells me I think of men too much you are very preoccupied with my pene,” Antonio smirked triumphantly at his comeback. He had him this time.

“Not particularly. I know you would like it if I was like you because I am so handsome,” he stroked his beard.

“I hope you get lice in that stupid beard!”

“I hope you get lice on your dick!” Bruno turned around again and turned on the speed, shooting through the crowd like a damn animal.

I hope you get lice on your dick...He glared at his back like it would help his frustration. What the hell did this asshole have against him? No matter where he went, what he said Bruno always showed up with a stupid, smug smile on his face. What kind of a man did that?!

“Do you even know where you are going?” he yelled up to him a couple of moment later. Annoying or not they had a job to do and Antonio intended to do it to the best of his ability-perhaps that way if the captain saw how hard he worked he could get transferred to a squad that didn't include the people currently in his.

“Of course, lice dick!”

“Fucking wait, pubic face!”

His chest was heaving from exertion, the armour that protected him more of a hindrance than anything else now. He would have missed it in the case of a fight however considering how he was everyone's errand boy today he wished for nothing else but to yank it all off and dive into one of the canals. Smelly or not. Bruno stopped, then returned to him if only to laugh at how he bent over breathing heavily as an old man would.

“You are stupid to wear all that armour.”

“Assassin. Might...fight,” he wheezed out. People were staring, he could feel their eyes on him. He tried not to care.

“The assassino? You believe that shit? So you are an idiot who listens to tall tales as well. What do you have going for you, cazzo, other than your face?”

What is he saying about my face!? “Va-Vaffanculo! It is better to err on the side of caution.”

Pain shot through his side-why is my body so much of a failure- and his hand went to the spot as he straightened up. It wasn't that he didn't want to keep going, he was just certain that he couldn't. He waved the other man away. “Go on without me.”

“And look like a deserter? Nice try, tiny dick, but we both know the punishment for leaving your comrades behind.”

“Shut up about my dick, stronzo, it is bigger than you can imagine!” he would show him if that weren't such an odd thought to have. He shook his head to clear it from his mind. The only person who would be seeing what hung between his legs was a woman. And only a woman.

“If you have enough breath to make up lies you can keep running, you lazy bastard,” Bruno started off at a jog, manoeuvring around a group of people and then was off like a shot. It was all he could do not to try and catch him and throttle him. Lazy bastard? He is the one who leans against every wall he can find, sleeps on rooftops and is late for patrol every morning! And yet I am the lazy one? Son of a bitch...The other man couldn't be caught, though. Not by him anyway and he had to settle with again tailing after him like some sort of hanger on. And now I look like the one who is lazy. If I was not so preoccupied with being angry at this asshole I would be nervous about the captain thinking I am as lazy as the rest of them.

They arrived at the doctor's soon enough and then set off for the priest but something gave him pause as they ran through the streets.

“Wait, you son of a whore!”

“What, can't keep up?” he stopped anyway though to turn and come back, “thought you saw a handsome face?”

“Shut the fuck up. Something is not right here.”

He bit his lip, chewed on it being a more accurate description as he inspected the area around them.
--
Antonio ain't takin' no shit anymore. With comebacks like pubic face how could he lose fights? xD; The story is going to jump around a bit as far as time is concerned because no one wants to read about the time their patrols went well so it's going to basically be all about their misadventures and them fighting until they eventually realize they want to bone. : |

They had been taking mostly side alleys and claustrophobic “short cuts” but now that they stood on a main street he found himself uneasy. Something wasn't right. He didn't know what only that it was. He gripped his lance tighter and strode towards the cart of hay off to one side of the street. Without a word he stabbed the spear into the hay, getting no response as it was hay and not living however when he yanked back the lance without any sign of something hiding in it his anxiousness receded slightly.

“If you want to stick your dick into things do it on your own time.”

Someone is watching us...His stomach well and truly began turning at the realization. It felt like eyes on him. He backed away from the cart to turn to Bruno who tapped his foot impatiently.

“Someone is here.”

“Si, this is a city. Hurry up, I am tired of waiting for you.”

They reached the priest without further incident though he still couldn't shake the feeling that they had been close to danger. I should not have said anything to that bastard. Now he will tell everyone I have women's intuition... He sighed. Oh well, it could have ended worse, he supposed. Or at least that was what he told himself until Bruno whispered something to the priest that had him telling Antonio about the sin of sodomy. Next time we are in danger I will leave him behind. And then he will be sorry.

POV change! XD

“Are you planning on standing there all day or will you actually do some work?”

“I was planning on doing many things, but working is not one of them,” Bruno leaned against the wall with a loud yawn in the other man's direction. They had done enough work for the day as far as he was concerned. Watching for thieves and assassins was hard work and he would take the rest of the day off as repayment for his sacrificing his morning for the citizens of Venice.

“We do not get paid to loiter around, stronzo.”

He looked around himself with a frown, then shrugged, “looks like I am.”

His relaxation was broken abruptly when a large, heavily armoured man lumbered over to the pair, “Pene, Stronzo, I know you are trying for private time but you are disgracing Venezia's milita.”

Bruno groaned at the 'nicknames'. “You really are going to call us that?”

“It fits, si? Sargent Stronzo and Private Pene,” the brute's laughter echoed in his helmet and Bruno rolled his eyes. You are not as clever as you think, cazzo.

“I am more suited to Pene than that bastard. His prick is probably so small it is like finding a needle in a hay stack anytime a woman wants to lay with him.”

“He has a spear, you always have your arse towards it. You are Stronzo, he is Pene,” the man said firmly, signalling the end of the conversation for now.

“I am not being fucked by that asshole.”

“No, you are the asshole,” Antonio, or as everyone else now called him, Pene, shot back. He was getting good at his retorts, Bruno had to admit. I am still better but he still has grown a pair of balls instead of sitting around looking like a woman who has lost her husband every time he is insulted. Or lost her dignity. Probably both.

“Bene, then you understand. Stronzo, Pene, there are thieves bothering the market vendors in Ponte di Rialto, go and kill the bastardi.”

“What? Why us?”

Bruno nodded, “I agree with that dick, why us?”

“Because if you do not then I will have you killed.”

I am sure you will and yet for all the times you have made that threat we still stand here. Pene to his credit looked about ready to piss his pants. And that was why Bruno should have been the man no matter who held the spear. He holds the spear like a woman so therefore I am the man.

“Fine, we will go,” he pushed off of the wall with a long sigh to make it known to all that he was suffering under a tyrant. But he still went. Idle threat or not he didn't want to be the one to drive the brute over the edge though he was so stupid Bruno doubted that would ever happen.

In a show of defiance he didn't run, instead walking as slowly as Pene did until out of sight of the other man. He could only walk for so long. This bastard walks too slowly. By the time we get to the market it will be tomorrow at this pace.

“Ey, hurry up, Pene.”

“Shut up, I will go as quickly as I like.”

“Quickly? Is that what you call this? My grandmother walks faster. And she is blind, deaf and has only one leg!” Bruno began at a slow jog as usual, waiting for his partner-the others had decided that not him-to ready himself as a show of mercy. It probably was difficult to run in all that armour. Then again, what did he care really?

“You do not intend on running all the way to San Polo, Stronzo,” the man said over the loud clanking of armour and the constant chatter of the citizens of Venice as they went about their business.

“I intend to run half way. And if you are lost then you are lost and I will not care.”

“I will not be lost, I know the city by now, idiota,” came the reply. He sounded irritated then again he usually did. The seeker had a stick up his ass. Probably more than one. Already he is falling behind. Why pair me with this old man who can barely even run for longer than 10 minutes?

“Yet you still follow me like a blind man. A race then, to see who gets to San Polo first,” Bruno halted for a moment, holding out his hand, “give me half of your armour and then it will be fair.”

“I am not taking off my armour for you.”

“Then I have already won. Ciao,” he sprinted, knowing that Pene would give chase almost immediately however he had a plan. A much better plan than anyone would think possible of him.

In a second he jumped onto the facade of a building, hand over hand climbing until he got to the roof then he lay on his back. Waiting. All he had to do was let the other man pass him, let him think he would win. Then I will have him. He didn't know why antagonizing him brought him so much joy only that it did and he wouldn't be stopping any time soon. Pene made it too easy with his nervous disposition. The way he is constantly looking over his shoulder you would think he was being followed constantly. Perhaps he was dropped on his head as a child. No, his face is too unmarred for that to be true. He closed his eyes-at the pace he was going it would take him hours to get to San Polo and when he did Bruno would be there waiting to scare the crap out of him. Until then I will enjoy the afternoon sun.
--
I enjoy writing Bruno/Stronzo a lot more so I'll probably continue writing from his POV. Also this fic is turning into just a way to make as many gay and dick jokes as possible I'm sorry. :'D

A foot shoved at him. “You alive?”

He groaned, “of course I am alive.”

When did it get dark? “You are in shit, you know. Better make up a good story,” the archer nudged him again. Fine, fine. I am awake. He sat up, scratching his beard with a yawn.

“They looking for me?”

“No. Why would they look for you?”

“Because I am handsome and talented. Va bene, I am going. Where is Pene?” in a moment he stood, fully awake though he didn't know how long he would last if he really was in shit.

“Pene? Oh, the seeker with the face like a horse.”

He nodded-it is not so much a horse's face. “The bastardo was probably hoping to get me into trouble.”

“Last saw him before my patrol in San Polo. I do not know where he is now, ask another archer.”

Well he hadn't intended to sleep but he was rested at least so there was that. He ran across the rooftops towards San Polo-navigating at night posed more of a challenge however he didn't fall to the ground below. The idiot is probably still waiting for me wringing his hands. I hope he took care of the thieves at the least.

He stood about another 15 minutes from his destination when he heard footsteps. Not the echo of his own but distinct, heavier footfalls across the stone roofs. Pene's assassino paranoia is rubbing off on me.His pace quickened anyway, not wanting to tempt fate or the assassin's blade by slowing down to check what the noise was. They may call me a coward but while they lie dead in the streets I will live to see another day. There had been stories going around in the past month of entire patrols turning up dead. Peace had left Venezia when the tales of the assassin had started up. Bruno didn't know if he actually had come to Venice or if the thieves were just more brutal than usual but the way they had been killed made him think trained killer rather than thieves with daggers. I need another partner. Pene is making me nervous by his nerves. Bastardo. And who had come up with the bright idea of splitting them into pairs again? It had been at least 3 weeks since they had started doing patrols together- he should have been far less used to Pene's attitude as he was as well as far less influenced by said attitude. If he wanted to go around sticking his lance into every hay bale they saw he could but the way he expected Bruno to agree with him that an assassin could be lurking in there made the agile want to punch him. Why would an assassin hide in a bale of hay? That is just stupidity.

Then again his plan had been to leap out of one. It would still work as long as Pene hadn't gone anywhere and was still patrolling. He should not be. It is at least 10 so he should have gone back to the barracks unless he is stupider than I thought.

He shouldn't have wondered. Pene was rooted to the spot, looking the part of a paranoid guard by constantly checking around himself for enemies even though he had a wall at his back and the canal to one of his sides. It was a pretty good, safe spot to be even if the other guards were all lounging about as if on holiday.

Bruno snickered-he is like a woman who has been stood up. Though he doubted even a woman would wait as long. He slunk down the side of a building in the cover of darkness to a hay bale. Once inside he found it oddly comfortable but itchy in all of the wrong places. Tights had been a bad choice.

He took note of when Pene was looking at the hay and rustled it until he heard the tell tale sign of a distressed seeker. For such a heavily armed man he is a coward. Diligent in his commitment to investigating but a coward all the same.

Before he could jab his spear in Bruno leapt from the confines of his hiding place with a yell that would have even scared a brute he bet. It was drowned out by Pene's in an instant. The man threw his lance down. Who knew he could run so fast? Even with a headstart Bruno still caught up to him by the time he reached the canal considering there was nowhere else for him to run that wasn't crowded with people.

“You fucking bastard you are lucky I did not run you through!”

Massive update!! OP is pleased ^^
Don't worry about the dick jokes. They really bring out Pene and Stronzo's personality! Though, their insults are nothing compared to thr brute's sharp tongue
“He has a spear, you always have your arse towards it. You are Stronzo, he is Pene,”
Needless to say that I was rolling on a floor and laughing :--D

Ahh I'm glad you're happy, OP! : D The dick jokes are what I based the characters on to begin with so I always feel like they best represent their personalities. xDD; The brute is quite a brute ha ha!

His voice cracked-he sounds like he just shit his pants. Bruno very nearly felt bad. Nearly.

“You scream like a woman giving birth.”

Despite not expecting the punch he still managed to get out of the way just in time. Another dodge and he ended up with his back against a wall. Better that than in the canal but he could still see the other man's eyes narrow as he stepped into what could only be described at Bruno's personal space.

“This is familiar.”

“Except you will not escape up the wall,” he said, his hand clenching the collar of Bruno's shirt.

“If you think I will be intimidated because you are taller than I am, you are wrong. I have fought you enough times to know your shitty tricks.”

“Why will you never leave me alone?!”

He clenched his jaw-a difficult question to answer, bastardo as I do not know myself. “I left you alone today and you waited for me. What is that? Do all men in Florence stand about like scorned women if someone does not show up?”

In an instant he slammed to the ground, his head struggling to keep up with reality and the weight on top of him. “I am not a woman, Stronzo!”
Pene stumbled over words for a moment then got to his feet, still sputtering like a water pump. What the hell was that for?! “What the fuck, Pene!?”

“Wh...What the fuck to you!” And there was the guy he knew.

“No, you what the fuck!”

Mi dispiace.”

“...You are serious?” Bruno tried to rationalize why any man would apologize. Then again, Pene wasn't exactly normal.

“You are an asshole. But I could have crushed you and I would not want to get into trouble.”

He smirked, smacking him on the back, “ey, I love you too, Pene.”

“I am not a sodomite.”

You could have fooled me. A snort nearly got him another punch but he jogged ahead into the light again, “go pick up your dick where you dropped it.”

“I am not a sodomite.”

“Si, si, I am certain the men believe that when you tell them that,” he made sure to keep a couple steps ahead for safety's sake however once they stepped back into the marketplace now mostly void of people he needn't have worried. They didn't physically fight in public anyway.

“I am not a sodomite!”

It echoed. As much as Bruno outburst of laughter at least.
--
Stronzo is only about half a head shorter than Pene but it's still a difference! xD Pene has a pretty long face though so with a non horse face who knows what the difference would be. Originally I wanted to make this fic more historically accurate but then halfway through the first bit I chucked that out the window because these two would be dead by now if I hadn't. :'D

He curled his lip at the water. Thanks to what the brute had called 'persistent obstinate behaviour' they had landed themselves on dock duty. Walking back and forth from one end of the dock of the castello district with only each other and the smelly sea for company. It was brighter by the water and it made his head hurt-the hangover from the previous night's festivities had nothing to do with it at all of course.

“Are you going to stick that spear in there every fucking time we pass, Pene?” Bruno muttered, slurring his words from lack of care as to what he sounded like.

“They say the assassino hides in them.”

“Who. Who says the assassino hides in hay stacks because you are the only one who I have heard say anything about the figlio d'un cane.”

No response to that. He is making all of it up in his head the way he does ghosts in his room. The first time Pene had told him he believed in ghosts he had laughed. And then realized he was serious. And was actually afraid of them. It made no sense. Yet Bruno had found himself leading the bastard around on a wild goose chase through the barracks until he collapsed into bed on far too many occasions. Usually after he himself had been the one to scare him. Then he blames me when people talk like he and I are a married couple. It is his fault. If he would stop being afraid of stupid things and involving me then we would not have such a reputation. He may be a Florentine but I am not.

Not last night, though. Last night they and 5 other men had gone to the tavern, eventually making their way to a brothel before calling it a night. Bruno couldn't say he remembered exactly what had happened only that his pouch felt lighter when he woke up. He didn't even know how he woke up on time let alone Pene who had been waiting for him in the courtyard. The way he drank I expected to be carrying him back to the barracks.

“Are you thinking?”

He blinked, realizing that he had been standing in the same spot for the past 10 minutes. “So what if I am?”

“...I do not believe it unless you are an imposter.”

Pene still paced, all nerves and noble intentions though his gait had slowed quite a bit before he finally came to a stop a moment later. His head was turned towards the water, looking at it like they hadn't seen the same damn canal for the past 2 hours already.

“Ey,” the agile plunked down to let his feet dangle over the edge of the dock though he didn't allow them to touch water.

“Ey to you.”

“Ey to your horse face.”

“Fottiti,” the glare that accompanied the words tried to be threatening but failed quite completely at it.

“I know, you are sad you can never have a face like this,” he patted his own face for emphasis, and shook his head, “only a woman cares about what her face looks like.”

“And you would know, having bedded so many women.”

Bruno nodded, “si, I have fathered a quarter of Forli on my own I am certain.”

He grinned at Pene's silence. The bastard was actually becoming likeable. Somehow. A miracle amongst the miracle that is my face.

“Forli is not so far from Florence.”

“What is your point, Pene,” he got to his feet again. Enough sitting. I miss the walking already.

“Do you not remember what happened last night?”

No. “Of course I remember.”

“Bugardio.”

You call me a liar and yet you lie right now. “Va bene, then tell me, all knowing Pene,what happened last night.”

“You...” his face was mostly hidden but what Bruno could see looked stricken with guilt or worry or possibly both.

“Spit it out before I get tired of waiting.”

“You and I...Lay together last night.”

What. “What.”

Pene turned away from him, “I woke up in your bed, bastardo.”

“...Naked?”

“Of course naked! Why would I mention it if we were not undressed, idiota!”

“Calma, Pene. I do not believe I would lay with a man such as you; it is a mistake,” he still continued to try and recall what had happened the night before though he came up with only vague snippets of himself drinking and drinking and drinking. And Pene puking in the canal on their way back to the barracks alone. Christo. I did bed him.

“The feeling is mutual, cazzo!”

“I said calma, not yell louder, stronzo! People are looking!”

“You are the stronzo!”

“Fuck you I could be the pene if I wanted!”

They unsuccessfully tried to murder one another for the next ten minutes, fists finding only air or unyielding armour. People well and truly did watch them now or at least until the brute, as usual being irritating by lurking around their patrol route, grabbed Bruno by the back of his clothes and yanked him away.

“Have you lover's quarrel somewhere else, stronzi!”

“He tried to have his way with me!”

“Pezzo di merda it was you who tried to have your way with me!”

“Florentine!”

“Woman!”

“Shut the fuck up!” the captain cuffed him across the back of the head hard enough for him to see stars even with his helmet on. His mouth snapped shut. Pene stood at attention like some sort of lumpy bean pole.

“What are you fighting about now? Which one of you who will wear the dress? It does not matter. Shut up and do your job or you will find yourselves face down in the canal, capiche?”

“Si.”

“Bene. Now get along before I tell everyone that you two consummated your marriage.”

I would not consummate a marriage with him. I would not even marry him to begin with. Even if a man could marry another man. Perhaps he wasn't so likeable after all. They finished their patrol without saying another word to each other.

--
Bruno scares Antonio by telling him ghost stories then climbing down to the window of his room and whispering scary ghost things. I swear this story gets more and more ridiculous the more I write it. OTL

Back to Antonio/Pene for a bit! xD

“Hey, Pene.”

Antonio scratched at his hair, wishing he had washed it the previous night-it got hot inside that helmet and his scalp hated him for wearing it. His hair always looked dirty no matter what he did anyhow being blond and a dirt magnet apparently. He sighed, sleep still hanging off of him insistently. Trying to convince him just to shut his eyes again.

“It's about Stronzo. They found him dead this morning,” the brute's voice was calm, serious and it made Antonio sit up quickly, slumber suddenly gone from his world. Stronzo-Bruno-No, Stronzo, couldn't be dead. Who the fuck had managed to catch the bastard for one?

“How?”

“The assassino, Pene. Threw him off a rooftop.”

“Let me see.” He couldn't believe it unless he saw a body. Stronzo wasn't dead. There just was no way. He had just seen him yesterday, the taunting remained fresh in his mind as if the words had just been uttered. And now they said that Stronzo was dead? No way. I saw him go to his room, unless he left after that for some reason.

“He has already been prepared for burial-that is not happening. ...You would not recognize his face anyway.”

“You are joking,” his voice sounded shaky even though it shouldn't have. What did he care if the idiot got himself killed? All he did was make fun of him and try to get a rise out of him and now his voice, his traitorous voice was shaking? He set his mouth in a line, though and met the other man's eye. He does not look like a man who is telling a lie so...

“Mi dispiace, I will tell you when the funeral will occur.”

“Bene.”

“You will have to go on patrols alone until we can find a replacement,” the brute headed for the door. Antonio nearly called to him that he didn't want to go if it was going to be solo but kept his mouth shut. Idiot or not Stronzo had good eyes and a decent head on his shoulders when it came to getting out of trouble-especially since stories of the assassin's escapades in Venezia had become more frequent the last thing he wanted to do was patrol alone. Why Stronzo? He would rather run than fight and if he was on the roofs at night why would he be wearing his uniform for the assassino to identify him as a threat? He couldn't change it yet as he readied himself early for the afternoon all he could think of was the why of the situation. Why Stronzo?

~~**~~

He stood in the courtyard for 10 minutes before remembering he didn't have to wait for anyone anymore. His head shook from side to side, trying to rid itself of the stupid thoughts that now plagued him. What had the bastard said last night again? What had he looked like when they had parted ways? Why was he wondering those things? He and Stronzo had openly fought, antagonized each other and given no sympathy when it had been needed but he felt strange that it was all over. What is wrong with me? The only upside to still working was that he couldn't bite his nails through his gloves though he took to chewing his lip instead.

When he passed the others they stared-had they always watched him like that? What did they want? Were they giving him some sort of pity because some asshole he didn't even like had gotten killed? I could care less if he is dead.

Venice felt larger and darker when he walked by himself though it may have just been the storm clouds overhead that made him think so. The citizens seemed more hostile, glaring at him as he passed like some sort of demon. Maybe he hadn't noticed because of Stronzo's constant nattering on about women and how much it reeked and how he wanted to sleep or drink or engage in any number of other activities unrelated to the task at hand. Maybe he hadn't noticed because he had focused on the other man so entirely that he blocked everything else out. Christo. I am a sodomite...

“Hey, Pene.”

It sounded so much like him that he couldn't help but spin around to face the person. Oh. One of his friends... Stronzo had gained a fairly large following of acquaintances at the least, friends at the most.

The archer normally situated on the rooftops stood against a wall in the shade, taking a break from the sun with his bow beside him. He was smaller than even Stronzo was-had been-and usually hung around while the morning patrol ate their lunches. Antonio couldn't say he remembered his name.

In place of a greeting he just nodded and continued walking.

“Wait, I talked to Bruno last night and he gave me this. Said in case anything happened I should give it to you.”

The man handed over a piece of paper sealed with wax. “Grazie.”

He didn't touch it until lunch. Even then he found the most secluded place he could find to read it while picking at his meal of bread. The paper remained stubbornly rolled until he used a glove to hold one of the ends to the ground; the other he held with his hand.

'Antonio,

I have said many things about you to many people-things like you are a sodomite which is probably true, and that you are often found in the brothel looking for men which is also probably true but I want to apologize. I know that you are none of those things. Well, you may love men but if that it the case I do not want to know. But I am sorry. I have never been good at making friends nor keeping them however you are one I would like to keep. Call me a woman if you like. We had many fun times together, did we not? Even if they ended with us punching each other. I have nothing to give to you other than paper because I spent my last bit of coin on drink so I would be able to write this without thinking too much about how womanly it is to send a note to your best friend. May your life be a happy one.'

Son of a bitch! You tell me to have a happy life after all of that?! He wiped his face with the back of his hand as if doing that would stop the ache in his chest and the tears from falling from his eyes. He shouldn't have been crying over such a stupid note. It was by far the worst message he had ever read, written on stained paper and resembling his 5 year old nephew's script. Yet he couldn't stop crying. All through his lunch he alternated between bites of bread and sobbing into his hands. Idiot, bastard, jerk or not Stronzo had been his friend. They had fought like cats and dogs yet they returned to each other even when they didn't have to.

The worst part of it all was that no one would talk to him. As if they thought it his fault. I should go home. There is nothing for me here.
--
Indecisive Seeker says "I hate him and I don't care if he's dead" later: "WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MY ONLY FRIEND IS DEAD". :'D

D: Oh no, tell me this is just another Stronzo's joke!
Poor Antonio! çç

Ha ha you'll just have to wait and see won't ya? ;D

What is this? WHAT IS THIS?! A Cliffhanger?! A bad joke from Stronzo?!
Ohhhh, let it be a bad joke from Stronzo!!

Re: OP

(Anonymous) - 2011-08-22 19:59 (UTC) - Expand

He had almost made up his mind to go when heard a tapping on his window. Ghost. Stronzo's ghost was coming to haunt him. That was his first thought anyway. When he went to his window though he found nothing. His quarters resembled a closet in size but he liked them that way-he could see everything other than what was inside the closet. Which he checked nightly. His mother had filled his head with stories of murderers hiding in places that no one would think to look in an effort to keep him from moving so far from home and now they were all coming back to the forefront of his thoughts. At night. When he had only a candle for light and no one for company. How had he even gotten to sleep before? With a sigh he got out of bed to get dressed. Only idiots walked the streets after dark but then again he could defend himself unlike the citizens. The night patrol is out there anyway. There is no problem.

The problem started when he saw white robes on the rooftop. Assassino! He had no weapon though so even if he had been able to climb up to the roof he would have ended up the same way as the man whose body slid to the ground. It was like God was punishing him for maybe, possibly thinking of another man as more than a friend. But he was already dead-it seemed like over kill to him. Or maybe this was punishment for the feelings, the death was to make up for the sex. Which he didn't actually remember other than waking up with Stronzo's arm over him which actually hadn't been very sensual at all. Another of their jokes? I cannot remember if we did anything and even if we did...Even if they had nothing had changed. Not really. It had turned into another fight-much like the one after Antonio had pushed Stronzo and made him fall onto his face he had a mark in the shape of his helmet for a week or when Stronzo had jumped out of his closet screaming like a banshee but they would have gotten over it. They would have been friends again by the next day or the day after that.

And now he couldn't even tell the other man that it didn't matter. Merda. There is no way to apologize now...He sighed. His mother would be happy when he showed up at her door but he didn't care. He didn't know what to do other than go home since he had no money to move elsewhere.

“You have bad luck, amico,” Antonio murmured to the corpse, fighting against the bile rising in his throat. You would not recognize his face. That thought pushed him over the edge. He ran as far as he could before being sick. His hand shook as he wiped his mouth-how old was he again? The way not even his own body responded properly to his commands made him feel 10 years old when everything was a crisis and even his own shadow at night scared him to tears.

He didn't return to the corpse, instead choosing to alert one of the others of the dead man and his sighting of the assassin. They nodded at him slowly. As if he was lying. They would find the body, though. And they would see he told the truth even if the assassin wasn't hanging around. It was too late to do much of anything yet he still didn't feel tiredness weighing down his limbs. I will walk until I am tired.

It was morning by the time he could walk no more. The guards had changed already and it registered in the back of his mind that he was supposed to be on patrolling. He was half way to running to the barracks before he and the brute crossed paths. His face twisted into something he hoped looked apologetic.

“Non preoccuparti, Pene. Go to the barracks.”

“I will...Uh...” what was the word he was looking for? “I will still go. Mi dispiace, I did not mean to stay out all night.”

It's guard love 1/??

OP

Authour anon

Re: It's guard love 2/??

OP

write anon

Re: It's guard love 3/??

Re: It's guard love 3/??

OP

Re: It's guard love 4/??

Re: It's guard love 4B/??

Re: It's guard love 5/??

Re: It's guard love 5b/??

Re: It's guard love 6/??

OP

Re: OP

Re: It's guard love 7/??

Re: It's guard love 8/??

Re: It's guard love 8b/??

Re: It's guard love 9/??

Re: It's guard love 9b/??

Re: It's guard love 9b/??

Re: write anon

OP

Re: It's guard love 10/??